the other side of hollyoaks

carrying the sword

2011-04-16T14:47:00.000-05:00

In the last few months Soren hardly recognized the boy he'd fallen in love with. Rupert had grown up. He was pretty sure it was the baby's doing. It fascinated him, actually.

"I think you're a bit posh for me now, Rup." Soren said ever so nonchalant as he undressed after work. He needed a shower just now. In spite of going green and a veggie menu for those regulars at the pub, there was still a might of grease to deal with. Fish and chips were still their mainstay.

"What? Are you serious?" Rupert gave him a snarl. He was feeding the baby a bottle so he couldn't lash out at him.

Soren bit a grin. Rupert was such a laugh. Soren edged around him then and put his hands on his shoulders and gave him a quick kiss on the neck.

"Just put the kiddie down and fresh'n up with me." Soren whispered in his ear.

"But I couldn't." Rupert winced.

Soren undid the button to Rupert's jeans anyway and edged his fingers to rest the top of his briefs, just for a tease.

"Come on, you want too." Soren grabbed his beltloop to lead the way toward the loo.

"Soren, please." Rupert hushed him, yet he was letting Soren lead the way. He thought he might be winning.

"What, being a posh bastard, now aren't, you?" Soren turned back sighed. Rupert shook his head, no. Soren fumed slightly and went to turn on the shower. He wanted it hot and preferably with Rupert. He took his time, to get in. The warm water finally hit his tired muscles and plunged his curls flat. He closed his eyes, thinking of the good old days. But then again, his Rupert had always been prim and proper, now hadn't he? Why should he expect anything different. Had to get a good dozen or so pints in him to have his way with him. Now, Rupert would look at a glass of red wine at dinner and turn away. He had to be good for the little one.

And yes, Soren had a way of looking at the baby as this thing that had come between them. Here they were fathers now to Rupert's sis's unwanted child. He sort of liked it. He did. Just he wanted his Rupert, too. He didn't want to share him.

Of course, he'd spent the first month full of sleepless nights. He wanted to sleep through all the crying, the feedings and the nappy changes, but Rupert wouldn't let him. After all, Rupert had made sure Soren knew was he was doing. No swearing. No late night party-nights. He'd given up a lot. It was just, he needed his sex. He did.

Just as he suds up, he saw that someone had come to join him. Soren felt Rupert's hands come around his face, and Rupert Frenched him as if to awake him from this lull. Soren just smiled. His fingertips found exactly what he was looking for. Yes, they definitely knew how to turn each other on. There were no questions to ask. He shouldn't have doubted Rupert.

its Christmas in the village

2010-12-18T10:29:00.000-06:00

"Paddy, are you sure you need to be in the picture with Santa and Sid?" Simon knew now that Paddy was pretty much a kid at heart. He so wanted the new gaming system where he could play a game by motion. He'd gotten it for him and it was wrapped under the tree.

Really, the lad needed as much attention as Sid, his ten month old son, who had sprouted up now, still fuzzy headed but walking these days. Kelsey still wanted him at her place. Of course, he was just down the hall. But it would be nice go on holiday with him. Alone. Well, with the exception of Paddy.

"Now..now..you must get in the photo, my luv. Its a family moment, you know." So Paddy grabbed him quick enough and Sid set in Santa's lap while the two leaned in on both sides of Santa. Full grins to the max.

"Are you gonna to see your brother during the holidays?" Simon asked after the little photo shoot that gave them Christmas ready pics in about fifteen minutes.

"Well, its not that he's called, now has he?" Paddy was sure to brush him off.

"Its Christmas." Simon gave him a glare. Paddy held on to Sid as if he were his own, and pretty much he was, because he looked after him while Simon still held down the tech part of the library. As it was, he was reprograming the computer system at the library. It had been a real headache, but he didn't want to bore Paddy with it.

"And you can't make me miserable. You can't." Paddy grinned, getting cheek to cheek with Sid who pulled at Paddy's ear and held out his other hand to his Dad. Simon took him and immediately the small child bit his nose.

"Has he been biting you?" Simon gave the kiddie right back.

"No." Paddy winced. "He's a little sweet pea, constantly."

Simon wasn't so sure he completely believed Paddy.

"Kel said anything? His Sis, teaching him this?" Simon was so offended that the little bugger would do such a thing to him.

"Dunno. Can't say its been mentioned." Paddy shrugged.

Simon gave Paddy a stare then. His lover and wife would hold his son against him, now would he? Simon gave a little smile. Sometimes, he wondered just what sort of power Paddy held. And why wouldn't he give a damn about his brother Maxie?

not much of a Manic Monday

2010-12-07T04:23:00.024-06:00

"What are you trying to do to me?" Gemma almost lost it when her brother Rupert brought the baby into her new boutique. It had just opened. She needed customers. Not reminders of her past. Especially, the baby she'd given him.

"Lyle wanted to see her." Rupert made his regrets. Naturally, Lyle picked the baby girl up, right away.

"OH MY GOD." He was thrilled holding up the baby close to Gemma. "Such a striking resemblence."

Finally, his glare settled on Gemma who was behind the counter. His smile faded.

"Its just a baby, for Christ sakes!" She had to jump into it before he could question Rupert.

"Don't you want to hold it?" Lyle looked at her seriously as he got closer, to the big onion head baby with the baby blue eyes.

"No, I don't." She puffed a frown. "We have business to tend to." This was suppose to take her mind off the infant she'd give up for the sake of their marriage.

Of course, there wasn't a customer insight. She hugged herself and turned away.

"She's a little hastey these days." She overheard Lyle tell Rupert when she have him back the baby.

"I heard that." She snapped.

"She's just saving her energy for when, you two have your own." Rupert assured him. He then looked at Gemma. "Have another three months, don't you, Gem?"

Gemma's face festered. She could not look at him, but nodded. Rupert reached for a black onezy for kiddies, "I'm a RocknRoller" it had printed across the front. He handed over some cash to Lyle then. At least, he bought something.

it won't be me

2010-12-05T10:30:00.000-06:00

Simon looked at Josh a bit grimly. Of course, it was him who scraped him off the floor and got him to the emergency. He'd stayed all night with him which honestly ended up being a month to nursing him back to health. Thank God, they both lived above the Black Cat. It was easier that way to check on him.

"Don't you think its time to leave him, alone now." Paddy's words. Simon just glared at him, shocked he'd say as much. Right here in Josh's flat where he laid slumbering.

Soon enough they got back to their own bedroom to have some fun.

"God, you know he's nothing to me." Simon winced. He was being ever so faithful to his lover and husband, Paddy. They were practically one at least at bedtime and at early rise too. Yet, he'd been there to bathe Josh, change his bandages. It was nothing he hadn't seen. "What do you expect me to do?"

"Maybe we could pay someone." Paddy brought Simon tea, in bed.

"I couldn't." Simon managed as if that might be close to prostituting someone out for Josh, who was weak now and would think sex might be part of his process of mending, completely. He knew the bloke well enough to know just how deep his wounds went. Sexual relations was just a daily function to him. But maybe this was the case with Paddy too, as he looked at him.

"You've done enough." Paddy had hardly let him sip his tea. He wanted Simon's flesh as he put his arms around him. He would take care of Simon's needs. No one else could.

They Frenched then and Josh was just an after thought. It was no longer troubling who might come to Josh's rescue. Evidently, it would not be Simon. Paddy would see to that as his fingers came around Simon's chin. He bit Simon's bottom lip with such affection.

come what may

2010-11-03T01:02:00.016-05:00

It had to be all a party.

Did Josh even have a job?

Well, the drinking was fuck'n great with Slash and Nicky. They'd started long before Halloween, meeting at the pub, getting stinking drunk. Playful fighting matches. And one of them had kissed him. Hadn't they?

Josh, couldn't think it could be a figment of his imagination. Just some fun. Really. It was great. He thought. Although, it was a bit of a blur. And since they didn't know anyone in the village. Just more fun with him.

"What does this mean, Josh? We're finished?" Fang found him on the floor of the Black Cat on Halloween night.

"Yeah, I'm afraid so." Wrong choice of words, Josh suspected.

Fang laid into him a couple of punches. Left him with a few broken ribs. Now he was black and blue and no one to see to him back at the flat.

He felt disgusting horrible now. What kind idiot was he? He felt so cold. He could barely have his dinner through a straw now. Of course, he hadn't said who had done this. It was just something he hoped to forget about. Maybe getting mixed up with Fang's family was not the thing to do. It felt like a rotten shit now. Yes, he guess he was prick. Through and through.

No one to blame but himself. He hadn't really wanted to be loved. Just fucked. There was a difference, he was beginning to see. And he hadn't really had anything that good in his life since Simon had left. If only he'd come around now. But he had a family with that Paddy now. Sharing a child with Kelsy. It was all disgusting, delightful.

As it was, he was at the bottom of the barrel. Just himself to blame. But which one had taken a like'n to him? It was just a faded dream. If only he knew? Was it Nicky who wanted him so badly, or Slash?

more than quaint

2010-10-31T01:44:00.037-05:00

"Nico can go too." They were out to trick or treat. Newt promised Leia. It seemed as if the kiddies were getting along fabulously at Randy's. It made Newt believe he could find bliss after Billy.

He hadn't heard from him in ages. Billy was a hit in Japan. He was a complete Rock and Roller now. Of course, there was a sad feeling inside him too. He wished he and Billy had never gotten married on such a whim. What was wrong with them? Really? All right. It wasn't exactly real in the books. Exactly. Yet, Newt had taken the vows so seriously, until recently. Until..until it came to be with Randy.

And it was everything he needed.

Sure, Randy didn't want to believe it, at first. But they just couldn't get enough of each other. It was an odd situation. Newt knew Randy had loved Franny, but he knew Randy needed him too. And things could be whole again, if they were in this together.

Randy was in the kitchen now. He had the baby in a contraption, next to him. Snug as a bug, and oh so content. He was cleaning up.

'You sure you want to do this, by yourself?" Randy told him the kids could just stay home. It was cold. They could put on a video. It would be enough.

"Its tradition." Newt put on his eye patch. He was going as a pirate this year and Leia was his princess. Nico was dressed like Spiderman. "We won't be long. Really. Just around the block, you know." Newt sneaked a kiss from Randy then. They could be happy. All of them. He knew this. He just had to wait and let Randy see that.

Randy was like night and day. Sometimes. He was this by the book Dad. Sad about losing his Franny. But then deep in the night when Newt was over. They touched and kissed and pacified each other as if it were just the two of themselves in this world. No one else. No kiddies to care for. Just each other. That was the Randy, Newt wanted all the time.

But Newt remained hopeful. He'd be the dad Leia and Liam wanted, the brother his own brother needed and the very best mate he could be for Randy...and of course, his lover.

new family matters

2010-10-30T10:44:00.000-05:00

Colin was in total shock when he found out Soren was a father.

"You and Rupert, raising a kiddie?" He was thrilled. "Kelsy, will just shit, when she finds out you two have been hiding this from her." Colin had Soren cornered in the kitchen down at the Black Cat.

"Really, it just..came up. I didn't know. Actually. It was a surprise for me too, but Rupert just can't get enough of our little Chrissy." Soren gave him an open grin.

"I thought it was your baby?" Colin gave him a serious glare.

"Oh. Right. Of course, its just he has more motherly instincts than I do." Soren's smile got small.

"I'm glad you two are getting along. Really, you two are the sweetest. Can't think of anyone else I'm glad to see it happen too. So you two are on the same page. No hard feelings?"

"No." Saren's eyes widen as she just looked at Colin.

"I'm really proud of you mate." Colin put his arm around him. They weren't just cousins. Soren had been a great help to him here to run the food part of the pub. "You need some time off, you know, with the little one?"

"Yeah, I guess." Soren looked surprised. After all, Colin had been working him as much as possible.

"Then a few days off, all right." Colin smiled.

Soren grinned as if he loved that idea.

now what???

2010-10-25T15:35:00.000-05:00

Breaking this off with Fang was much harder than Josh ever anticipated. How could he give up someone so amazingly fit like him. Smart. Money. He was everything Josh needed. Wanted. It was nice to be kept. On the other hand, he felt he'd been Ste's keeper. Always having to make sure the lad never got in trouble. As it was Ste was in the slammer. Or was it rehab? Honestly, Josh wasn't sure. They'd lost contact. He'd sent letters. He'd tried. But nothing. It was not like Ste had ever been his lover, and he soon wasn't worried about him thanks to Fang.

Still Josh felt in the wrong. OK, the guilt came and went. He'd go in bouts. Yes, make a clean break. Say he was done with their fling. He could hardly call it a relationship with Fang. On again. Off again. It had just about got the best of his stomach ulcer.

Finally, he landed in the emergency. Yes, he was too old for this shit..or it would just make him old in the making. But before Josh could make a clean break with good old Fang, well, Fang's cousins came for a visit, Slash and Nicky. Twins.

Josh couldn't believe his luck. Damn if they didn't look an awful lot like Fang and they were footballers. Josh thought he might pass out. How could it be? Was it luck or a curse?

it takes 2

2010-10-15T14:39:00.022-05:00

Lyle felt as if Gem loved him more now. She kept wanting him near her now.

"You sure you aren't coming down with something?" He thought she might be sick. She'd lost weight. Someone having a baby wasn't suppose to lose weight, was she?

"No, no of course not." But she couldn't get enough of him. It was sort of like a new honeymoon. He supposed. Although, not with that much sex. Yet, she was loving just the same. And he was happy she was back.

"You really thing helping out at the Black Cat is the best for our financial needs?" Gemma brought to his attention.

"What do you mean?" As if he had any cash to start a business.

"Really, is Cecil doing anything in his record shop these days?" Gemma asked.

"You know, he's got his recordings going on. Busy with the local scene." He told her.

"What if we have a boutique? Consignments to start with. And, and T-shirts." Gemma offered.

"We talking a hodge-podge, are we?" He winced wishing they'd go back to kissing and cuddling.

"Perhaps. I really think we could sell items, folks want. Cool rock'n roll T-shirts for kiddies." Gemma smiled.

'It might work." He so wanted things to work out for them. If it meant starting a shop, he was for it.

what ballocks

2010-10-12T09:07:00.000-05:00

Josh was a little worried that he hadn't heard from Ste. He guessed. But not really. Things had got so hot and heavy with Fang. He tired not to think that he was possibly breaking up the bloke's marriage. It was like it didn't exist when they were together.

But then he saw Fang down at the shops with his wife and kid. It really stung him, finally. He was a homewrecker. Funny, it just never hit him that he was that. It was all so splendid.

Granted, the nights were late and he never got to wake up next to Fang. He just went on with his job, and tried not to dwell on the fact that Fang was not attainable. Really, he needed to be thinking of Ste. He really did love him. He thought. But it had always been a bit tainted. Being with Ste was like being with a wild one. He was rather unpredictable. And this last little lashing out made Josh realize that Ste was possibly not the right bloke for him. Neither was Fang.

God, why hadn't he taken Simon back when he had a chance?

"When was that chance? Aye?" Ian told Josh he was fool, down at the Black Cat..just after he'd seen what Fang had to go home too. A pretty lass with a cute little tike.

"I feel fuck'n lost, all right." Could he just leave it at that? He couldn't help but feel his life was fucked cause thats all he was looking for lately, a good fuck. "Maybe its time for me to just leave this old town."

"Jesus, would you listen to yourself? You got a fantastic job. You really think you could just start over anywhere? These days?" Ian told him he better think again.

"But I don't want Ste back." It was the honest truth. And he knew he better stay the hell away from Fang, too.

"Man up, will you." Ian gave him a glare. Josh just scowled. What was that suppose to mean?

just believe

2010-10-08T07:43:00.000-05:00

Newt knew somebody had to be there for Randy. He'd made the calls needed and what he couldn't get done for Franny's wake, Jamie took care of the rest.

After all, there was the baby girl to take care of. She was sweet and looked as fare as both Randy and Franny.

"You thought of a name yet?" Newt helped him with the infant when Randy got back to the flat with her. It was so empty now. Just full of Franny's things.

"I can only think of one name, but she's gone." Randy could barely sputter. He looked as if he had a horrible cold.

"I think she'd love it, you to name her after her mother." Newt tried to smile.

"Frannie. Just Frannie. Baby Frannie." Randy was a bit stiff and did his best not to show emotion, but that was all he had.

Newt took the baby and put her in her crib. He came back to Randy. Finally, Randy let go and had a good cry. All Newt could do was to hold him.

"I never thought it would come to this." Randy could barely whispered. Newt got him to bed then. They were fully clothed. Randy had his back to him but was still wrapped up in Newt's warm. He was so sad. Newt rested his face against Randy's back.

"Its not your fault. It isn't." Newt told him, but Randy didn't answer. He laid there hemorrhaging in tears that came in waves. But Newt didn't let go. Finally they kissed. Newt's hands came around Randy's face. He touched his abs. Kissed his neck more. Newt wasn't leaving Randy now.

how its done

2010-10-06T22:44:00.000-05:00

"Whats really on your mind, Lyle?" Paddy had nothing else better to do. He knew the bloke was down. He thought he might help him get ready for another night at the Black Cat.

"Well, if my luv would ever get back, then I might get this settled with my sister, I never knew." Lyle shrugged.

"Sister?" Paddy was intrigued. "She's here in Hollyoaks?"

Lyle nodded as he wiped down the bar once more. He was quite a neat freak, or at least Paddy suspected. He went to check for the beer nuts. Really, people wanted a good nut instead of that American processed crap they called cheese on chips.

"Aren't you excited?" Paddy smiled.

"Don't want to get my hopes up, I suppose." Lyle looked back at him.

"I see." Lyle put the nuts in bowls on the counter. "Well, you have to take the first step. Cause, evidently, she doesn't know. Just introduce yourself."

"Thats where I was need'n Gemma to be with me." Lyle nursed his bottom lip. "You know, for support."

"Support." Paddy nodded as if he'd heard of it. "And this is the thanks you get? Gemma going on holiday?"

"We are a bit tight for space over at me Mum's." Lyle thought that could be it.

"You two should move in here." Paddy suggested. In fact he told him he'd ask about it right now. "That's whay you two need. You're own space."

Lyle slightly smiled as if he hadn't thought of that.

the long way home

2010-10-03T16:41:00.025-05:00

Gemma couldn't stop crying. She knew she had to get her act together soon enough. She had to remember that the baby was safe now and there was another on the way. This one was Lyle's. Everything would be all right. She had to believe that.

Now she thought of her own mother and how she must have felt with she was born. Why had she gotten her life so complicated? Honestly, she love Lyle. She did want to be his wife. She wanted to make things work in Hollyoaks.

She then wondered if he'd met his sister yet. Amy. She knew she hadn't been sweet and loving as a wife should be. Gemma knew she had a lot make up to him.

She found her way to the train station. Really, she felt so lost now. If only she could have held Crystal a little longer. She yearned to see her baby girl again. But still she wanted to believe she'd done the right thing. Giving the child to Rupert and Soren. After all, she would be Crystal's aunt, but a sad feeling swept over her as she found her seat. Her body still ached from the child birth. Yet, one was alive and kicking inside her.

The doctors were in shock over the discover. She was afraid they were going to put all this information in a physician's journal. Really, she just wanted to be left alone. She wanted to find Lyle. Really, she did love him. She was sure if it now. Gemma knew what love was.

She got out her mobile then and rang him.

"Hullo." He said after the first ring. "Where ya been?" He knew it was her.

"Just some time alone. Sorry I was-was so selfish." She bit back tears. "But I'm coming home and I hope you see your sister, soon."

"Do you know how furious I'm with you?" Lyle snapped. "If-if you weren't in this condition, I'd-I'd...just..just get home. Please." Then she heard him say that he loved her. Gemma smiled then. It was worth it to hear those words. "I love you too." She told him and meant every word.

one step beyond

2010-09-29T16:21:00.000-05:00

"Dunno if putting my name on the birth certificate was the thing to do?" Soren squinted now as he looked over all the papers now.

"Christ, couldn't very well have been me. I'm a brother after all." Rupert reminded him. He was juggling the nappybag and the little one. Soren almost laughed.

"You're about to lose Chrissy." Soren took the baby girl from him. It was starting to rain. They had to get on the road. It would be an almost four hour trip home.

"Its not Chrissy, its Crystal." Rupert gave him a sharp look. His blonde hair ruffled in the wind."Don't you remember, anything?"

Soren got the baby in the backseat carseat. He would chauffer the two of them home. Finally Rupert got settled in the back. He felt a little sad that

"You sure we'll have enough room for all of us back at the boarding house." Soren looked at him in the rearview mirror.

"We'll make do. We have too. Not like neither of us have a trust fund." Rupert looked so tired. Soren could see him dozing before the infant did.

"One more reason why we shouldn't have taken the challenge, but its too late now." Soren sighed. He just didn't know if he could live with such a lie. Could he ever really be someone's father?

what to do

2010-09-20T13:45:00.000-05:00

"What should I do?" Lyle felt he was in a fix. He'd been helping out with more shifts down at the Black Cat than he wanted. He knew Gemma was upset with him, but he just suspected she'd go to her sister's Kelsey, but her sister hadn't seen her.

"She's a fickle thing, you know." Kelsey informed while he was pouring up Lagers for the evening crowd. "I'm sure she's fine."

"But she won't even return my messages." Lyle glared at Kelsey who looked more like a gypsy these days than a music teacher. "I'm worried. Can you please try to see if someone knows something. I want to call the coppers."

"Oh, don't. I'll track her down. One way or another." Kelsey promised. "Besides, we need you here. The cook is on holiday. The hubby is short-handed everywhere."

Lyle's smile was more of a smirk. He felt he was someones slaves at these prices.

"Why don't you put us on a show, boy." Some old man whistled at him.

"Why the fuck should I?' Lyle yelled back.

"You want to make some extra cash?" Someone else said.

"What you got in mind?" Lyle wince.

"A strip tease, why not!" An old woman promised she'd watch. So would some of the younger ones.

Lyle jumped on the bar then. He hoped he got more than change in their pockets if he did this.

a question or two

2010-09-14T22:50:00.018-05:00

"I'm aware, I took you two from something." Gemma didn't dare ask if the two had spoken to Lyle.

"No, you didn't sis." Rupert took her hands and pulled her toward the sea and sand. It was such a nasty overcast. How could they enjoy this time?

"But you brought him?" Gemma tensed.

"He drove. I don't drive. We can go home when you want. We can all go home." Rupert held on to her hand. Soren was off down the shore looking for treasures.

"I dunno what to do. Honestly, I don't." She looked into her brother's still eyes. He was listening. "I can't give this baby to either Fletch or -" She squinted hard, shaking her head. "I can't. They are such imbeciles. What I want is..is could the two of you raise the baby?"

"What?" It was as if Rupert was finally awake and listening to what was really wrong. "Are you serious?"

"Yes." Gemma gritted. "Would you?"

"We live in a boarding house, Gemma." Rupert cracked up.

"I live with my husband over an old record shop. Its not any better. The rooms are small, and his mother's a kitchen witch." Gemma reminded him.

"Is it really what you want?" Rupert asked.

"Only if you would be all right with it." Gemma sucked in a breath.

The waves were being so choppy now. And suddenly Gemma felt her legs bolt. Honestly, she was certain the baby was coming. "Please, Rupert, Please..help me?"

Rupert turned to Soren. It was time to go to the hospital.

it'll be fine

2010-09-08T01:42:00.012-05:00

"What does this mean exactly?" Alfie cornered Newt in the kitchen. At least Amy and the baby were home. They still hadn't decided on a name for her.

"Look, you've got your own troubles." Newt managed to smile as he went to start dinner. "Get that lass of yours a name."

"Look, Newt, you and Billy aren't finished, are you?" Alfie was serious. "You still together, right?"

"Dunno." Newt turned from Alfie and reached for a mac and cheese dinner in the cabinet.

"Shit, hasn't been that many months since you two said your I DOs. What happened?" Alfie wanted to know.

"Its nothing. Really." Newt winced. He didn't want to say it was all his fault, but he bloody well knew it was. "We're fine, all right." Newt wasn't even thinking of salvaging it. They were going their own ways. Didn't mean any less that they were a couple. They had children together. Billy would always be family.

"I want you to be happy, dear brother." Alfie put his hands on Newt's shoulder.

"I am. really." Newt looked him in the eye. Of course, Newt wasn't certain exactly who's reality he was speaking up. Maybe he liked things the way they weren't with Randy.

never a miss

2010-09-04T16:19:00.000-05:00

"What? You're not really going?" Soren asked the next morning as Rupert was packing his backpack for a small trip to see his sister at seaside.

"Yes, I have to, but..but you don't have to go." Rupert assured him. He'd take the train. Nothing to it. "I know you have things to do."

"But.." Soren couldn't help but be sad. "I want to be there for you. I have too."

"We can make a holiday of it." Rupert was serious. This was obviously serious about Gemma.

"Well, I can't just let you go. Alone. I want to be with you." Soren was certain he had to be there. "I promise, I won't keep you from your sis. I'll only be there for you."

"Shit." Rupert looked up at Soren. "All right. I guess so."

Soren hadn't meant for him to fret. He got his stuff in a nap sack and made a few calls. He would have felt so naked not to be with Rupert. It was like he was his better half. They were good together. And he seriously wanted to be there for his partner. What ever may come, they would be there for each other. He just hoped this sister of Rupert's didn't make him ill.

"She's such a homophobe." Soren couldn't help but say on their train ride.

"You seriously have to be sweet to her in her condition. You will won't you?" Rupert winced.

"OK, of course, I will." Soren slightly scowled. "She won't ever get used to us."

"She might." Rupert looked at Soren then. He took his hand. He didn't want to make a fuss. He'd came all this way to be with him. And now he had to mind his P's and Q's. It really could be dreadful, playing his part. But he was sure it was worth it to be with Rupert.

Its always sunny there

2010-08-26T02:35:00.026-05:00

Rupert couldn't stop laughing with Soren. They'd been out to a new club and jumped like idiots for hours listening to pounding music. It was good fun. No one got hurt. The giggling went on long after they got back to their place and undressed just to make each other happy. It had been all around a wonderful evening. They'd made out quite a bit with a good fuck in the making.

Now Rupert's body could hardly move as the alcohol had finally settled and he felt all the more in a bed of cement now next to Soren who was snoring practically in his ear. He was half awake when he heard his mobile vibrate in his pocket, the jeans on the floor. He did his best to manage the call as he laid there.

"Hullo." He thought he said, but his head throbbed. He squinted hard.

"Rupie?"

"What?" It was a female's voice. He didn't know any females. "Who's this?"

"Ya sis." She told him.

"Gemma? Is that you?" He winced. He could hardly hear her. "Where are you?"

"Went down to the shore." Her voice didn't sound right.

"What? A late holiday? Is Lyle with you?" Rupert edged up on his elbows.

"No. I'm alone." Her voice was dull and quite sad.

"What happened?" He sat up then as his feet dangled off the bed. He finally managed to put his feet on the floor.

"I've left him."

"What?" Rupert scowled, scratching the back of his head. He reached for his jeans then. "You don't sound well. I'm coming to get you."

"I dunno what to do." She wailed then.

"All right, Sis, I'll see to it." Rupert sighed, looking back at Soren. He hoped leaving his lover a note was sufficient enough.

In a bad way

2010-08-24T01:10:00.031-05:00

"Christ! You can't let this ruin you, you know." Gemma didn't know what else to say to Lyle about this new information about a sister. "Did you say anything?"

He was moping about. Wouldn't eat dinner. He'd turned in early and was being a baby, she assumed. All bruding and what not. A real fucking Heathcliff ..withering his heights, she'd decided.

"No." He was all pouty and hugging himself like he had no one.

"Babes, don't be so down." She touched his arms, but he wouldn't let her close. He wanted to be alone.

"Fine." Her eyes lit. A bit of her thought this might be the final straw. What would he be once she told him this baby wasn't his. She didn't know who's baby it was, but it was definitely not his. "Brude all you want. OK. Just don't make yourself sick and forget where we're going in life." She grabbed her bag. She had to get out of here.

Before she knew it she was at Monty and Fletch's.

"Christ, you could have called." Monty was high on something. Fletch really wasn't much better. They were conformers after all of their rock'n roll lifestyle. She didn't know what to say to either of them. She was so far away from that world now.

Of course, Fletch had to give her a tummy rub which she didn't take to kind too.

"Woo, look at you, all fat!" He laughed with a big goofy grin.

"Ha, no thanks to either of you." She swelled a scowl as she looked at both of them. Did it really matter who's it was? They were both slacking potheads. She hugged herself then. Look what became of them. Idiots. Drugs. The two of them were just amazingly fucked in pure ganja bliss. She was fucked, too. Evidently. "Look, you fucks, I have only one thing to say to you." She'd decided this might be for the best.

"What?" Monty left out a big cloud of smoke from the bong.

"I'm leaving." She didn't know what else to do. "I'm leaving Hollyoaks." Suddenly, she was all alone. Wasn't she? Nothing was what it seemed. She guessed. It was an awful moment. But it was time to make her exit. She was screwed.

no rose colored glass

2010-08-21T10:21:00.003-05:00

Lyle was with his Mom at the hospital. Her dear sweet husband Cecil was too busy to be there with her every week. Since his mom was past 45, she had a high risk pregnancy. Of course, everything was looking lovely. But still she went in for weekly stressed test.

They past by the baby ward. His mother couldn't get enough babies. Just then, she looked in at a family gathered around a blond girl. She stopped.

"What is it?" Lyle winced.

"Nothing." She clammed up.

"Don't give me that. You know her." Lyle looked his mother over. She looked as if she'd seen a ghost.

"Possibly." Neve sighed. "I knew her father."

"And?" Lyle glared as if this was probably a lot more important than she wanted him to know.

She nursed her bottom lip.

"What is it?" Lyle squinted.

"She's your sister." Neve finally spilled as if she might go unconscious. But she didn't.

"My sister? When were you gonna fuck'n tell me, mum?" Lyle scowled.

"Never." Neve looked sad.

"Jesus." Lyle turned down the hall, but then he wanted to take another look at the young mother. "Who is she?"

"Amy. Amy Barnes."

"And I'm a Barnes too?"

She nodded.

What was he suppose to do now? Go and introduce himself?

the time is now

2010-08-19T10:14:00.000-05:00

Billy came to the hospital as quick as he could. Although, he couldn't be sure why he was there. Wasn't like he was the father of Amy's baby. True, Newt was a real uncle.

Sadly, he knew they were drifting a part. It could have been his fault. Thing was Billy had no idea what to do with his life. He hated how Newt straightened things out. He had a job now at the hospital. He was supporting the family well enough. It was a nice little unit. And Billy felt he'd let them all down.

Well, his music was finally taking off, but he couldn't stay here in Hollyoaks. He'd have to move to Japan if he wanted to be a pop-star. It was just a matter of time.

Billy had to think this was like ripping a band-aid off. Really quick, before the pain set in. He'd just tell them what was happening at the hospital. He had a ticket, already. Just a few hours til it was time.

He found Newt out in the hallway. There was Leia with him. Liam in his arms.

"Good. I have you all here." Billy mustard up a smile.

"Yeah?" Newt looked tired, but still strong. Strong enough to take the news. "Glad you're here. Its a baby girl."

"Really?" Billy hadn't expected that. "She doing OK?"

"Great." Newt smiled.

"Good." Billy sucked in a breath. "Look, I got some news for you. And you take how ever you like."

"What is it?" Newt winced.

"I'm leaving." Billy touched Leia's blond hair.

"Leaving? What do you mean?" Newt looked hurt.

"Japan. I can make load of cash, you see. And, and I'll send back all sort of goodies for you, Leia. Maybe if things go well, you could come to visit." Billy smiled as if he might have taken a good drug somehow.

"Do you know what you're doing, Billy?" Newt shook his head, no.

"Yes, I think I do." Billy nodded. He was tired of being depressed. Being the one who didn't shine through when he could have.

"Do you even know the language?" Newt's face tensed.

"It'll be all right. I have to. I have to do this. I have to see what I'm made of, Newt." Billy pressed a smile. Newt hugged him tight then. But he didn't tell him Don't go. Instead, he clinged to him for the longest time. It almost took Billy's breath away. He wasn't quite sure they were done. Possibly, they were.

one of those home recorded moments

2010-07-27T05:19:00.024-05:00

Alfie could hardly believe his eyes, lately. Any day now Amy would have their baby.

She'd gotten on with someone only line who had discovered her illustrations. They'd hired her to do biology drawings from home. She faxed them in once a week. It was money. Plenty more than he was making. It was a big shock to the both of them that she could find work like that.

A part of him felt he was the gold digger now. Working down a the pub. Managing the music end of the establishment with Cecil. But it was a happening place this summer. A new band every night of the week. Kids shows in the afternoon. All age shows in the evening and Adult shows on weekends at midnight. He was a busy guy, but still he didn't feel quite as talented as Amy.

But he had nothing to complain about. Yet, he'd noticed a change in Newt and Billy. Much more quiet, he supposed. It was almost they were going their separate ways, lately. Newt was hitting the gym more and Billy...well, he was just Billy.

Naturally, Billy said everything was fine. He couldn't get much more out of him than that. Maybe it was because he was Newt's brother than he wouldn't exactly say what was troubling. But maybe it was nothing. The two were still together. And between the four of them, there was someone always home for the kiddies.

Yet they were having less and less family meals together, due to scheduling, he supposed.

"We really need to figure out where we can all eat together, at least once a week. Sunday's you think?" He suggested to everyone once he saw them in the kitchen together.

"How about right now?" Newt just smiled as if there was no time to schedule anything.

"Good enough for me." Amy waddled to the fridge to see what was to eat. Of course, as soon as she cracked the door open, Alfie was sure there a big spill. Only it wasn't. Just that Amy's water broke. She gave him a stressed look.

"Well?" Alfie looked to Newt, who helped him get her to the sofa. Once Newt got her track pants slipped off he checked to see the progress.

"JESUS, Amy! How long you been having contractions?" Newt winced.

"Dunno." She looked quite innocent about the matter.

"The kiddie's already crowning." Newt told her.

Alfie sighed. Nothing like having a birthing to keep the family together. Billy went to take Leia and Liam upstairs. Not everyone needed to see this.

maybe its not what you do

2010-07-22T05:08:00.018-05:00

Lyle was expecting Gemma to be much more excited these days.

"Is it me?" He asked his mother Neve.

"Don't think so." Naturally, she was making herself quite at home at Cecil's. She didn't seem tired at all to be pregnant with his little one. She was cleaning the place up and creating storage. It was almost annoying to Lyle.

"Then what is it?" It had to be something.

"She's frightened of the future. Once she has a little faith in herself, she'll be all right." Neve shrugged as she was working on making pickles at the moment. She'd already raided Kelsy garden and made blackberry and raspberry jam for most of the neighborhood. Lyle swore she was only here to baby Cecil. He was a bit jealous of the two. Lovemaking all night, he reckoned.

"How long might that take?" All he had lately going for him was bartending at the Black Cat and worrying with the sound system in the basement.

"Don't worry so much? You never know, you might find that family you've been searching for." She eyed him then.

"What the fuck, you going on about, Mum?" Lyle squinted. He hated it when she talked in riddles.

never say never

2010-07-17T15:27:00.000-05:00

Dr. Vargo kept looking at Ste as if he needed to fess up to something. At least Ste wasn't in a straight jacket now, nor a padded room. But he was sedated. He could barely look at the doctor now. It was a little unnerving, but Ste was too tired to care. He was part of the system now..now wasn't he? He had to obey or they'd up the meds. He just wondered how much more he could take before he was in a complete coma.

He stared at Vargo. He hadn't an inkling what his first name might be. Maybe it was Bob or Jeffery. Probably Godfry. Ste nursed his bottom lip. What he wouldn't give for a cigarette right now. A call home, perhaps.

"How are you feeling today?" Vargo started with the questions.

"Fine." Ste barely managed to say. Wasn't that what he wanted to hear? Ste stared at him like a mad dog. A part of him hated him so much. And yet another was dreaming of his lips touching Vargo's lips. Ripping his glasses off his face and having a good go of a make out session. Perhaps touching him places with lust and sex surfacing up inside him like a tainted infection. Ste almost smiled. Why did it give him such an energy he wanted so much to purge? But he couldn't.

"You don't have to lie to me." Vargo stared at him as if he were trying his best to get inside his head.

"What do you want to know! I bloody hate this place! I do." Ste spit out as if it were the truth that Vargo already knew.

"Ste, I only want to help you." Vargo was serious.

"Yeah, as if I seriously believe you....NOT!" Ste scowled.

"Look, if you want to get any better, you have to let me in. Please. Can you do that for me?"

Ste just gave him a sneer with a leer. Hell, no, he thought.

keeping them together

2010-07-01T01:38:00.023-05:00

"What if they move?" Kelsy didn't want to think about it, but Simon could take their son away. He was still a babe. Of course, he was moving about. Almost walking, in fact.

She was getting breakfast out of the way and Colin was still helping her. She had plans to go back to teaching now. Since she had an able body at home to take care of the babes, but of course, she kept putting it off. Finally, it was now or never.

"Well, don't talk about it, and be a sweet as you can be." Colin went to change a nappy.

"God, I just can't stand, Paddy. I wish I could, but I don't." Kelsy fretted.

"Let Paddy get to know Sid, will you. You have to. You knew it would come down to this sooner or later. And Nancy, well she could be left with the other teacher's kiddies." Colin suggested.

"Why should I? They are siblings. They should be together in everything." Kelsey tensed.

"Luv, please, you have to. Its your only choice. Sometimes, you have to keep a family together, by pulling them apart. Just try to make Paddy feel part of the family here." Colin told her.

Kelsy squinted. She knew it was hard. Yet, this was happening too quickly. It was hard to share her children with anyone.

quite natural

2010-06-28T04:25:00.017-05:00

Simon was looking through a vegetarian cookbook on the couch while Paddy was off opening a bottle of wine. It seemed they were all alone. No Sid to bother with at the moments since he was off with his mum and sis.

"What the devil are you doing?" Paddy gave him a half scowl as he handed over the red wine.

"Just thinking of our health, you know." Simon shrugged as he put a lock of blond hair behind his ear, Paddy set nest to him, taking his hand with a light kiss just to put his hand near something excited to see Simon. A smile gave way from Simon as he looked at Paddy.

"Its just something to think on, you know." Paddy gave him a sly smile as he sipped his wine then. He played with Simon's hair then and gave him a soft slow kiss as if this might be the time to be in bed instead on the sofa.

"Josh, was in rare form today." Simon finally said.

"Why bring him up, at all? Really, must we?" Paddy toyed with the collar of Simon's shirt instead while Simon drank a bit of wine.

"He seems so far away now. Like I never really knew him." Simon told him.

"Maybe you never did." Paddy was even lipped as he stared at Simon.

"But why is he so bitter? What did I do that was so wrong?" Simon wanted to know.

"Babe, I don't like it when you talk that way about yourself. You are just staying true to you. He however, is just a wanker. Who, you are far better away from, now aren't you?" Paddy gave him a serious look.

Simon smiled more, giving Paddy a kiss and he slid his fingers right where Paddy wanted. He was definitely getting the hang of being a newlywed, and he planned to make the most of it even on the couch. Naturally, Paddy was ready for him.

it should have been swell

2010-06-25T01:18:00.002-05:00

All right, Josh had done a bad thing. A shitty thing, in fact.

He'd slept with Fang.

Well, if he'd never seen Simon and his new partner, he might not have stooped so low. Although, he didn't feel low at the time. He thought Fang was maybe the best he'd ever had. He was so many things that Josh wasn't. He was fit. Smart and damn well worth the fuck.

Fang had let him have a go at him. It was a might funny since...Fang was bigger than he. And he'd let him have his way.

It was just brilliant. Electric, in fact. And now it had turned cold, cause it seemed to be a one off in the end. Doubt he'd hear from Fang again. It had left him blue, and he knew he needed to be true to Ste, but it was all so damn hard. Him being away and all. Hadn't even had a chance to contact him.

Josh was in limbo. And he didn't like it.

"You're just an arse." He told Simon at work. He went all the way to the back to find Simon bent over a computer, editing shit for the library. Right boring work, but Simon loved it.

"What?" Simon looked over his wire rimmed glasses with a scowl.

"You know what it is." Josh rudely reminded him. "Who goes off to the fucking seaside to get married?"

"Definitely not the likes of you." Simon scolded even more. "Just why do you care?"

"I'm sick of your lovely shit. First a baby. Now this. What next, aye?" Josh gave him a disgusting stare.

"Why? A place of our own. Nitwit." Simon went back to his work at the computer.

Josh just fumed.

"By the way, who was that bloke I saw you with other night?" Simon shot back as Josh was about to walk away.

"A-a friend." He didn't want to get into it with him about Ste. There was little left of their friendship now. Simon had made damn sure to cut his loses now with him, and it really maddened Josh that he could be so unkind.

honestly now

2010-06-19T01:10:00.013-05:00

Paddy didn't give a shit what might be on Kelsy's mind. He was to drink and be merry at her little impromptu party for her dear sweet Gemma and Cecil. It was just lovely.

He bit into a cracker and watched from the sidelines as he nursed a sauced punch. Really, it was an interesting family. How the hell did it get so big? He listened to Kelsy talk of her painful childbirths. It was enough to scare any child away, now wasn't it?

"Better watch it, sounds like you might have more than one babe to watch over." Paddy mentioned to Gemma like a bad omen. He saw how her eyes lit. It made him smile with a touch of laughter.

"What do you mean?" Neve approached him then. "You look a might familiar to me."

"Haven't you been listening. Sounds as if Kelsy's been cursed. You know, she and Gemma coming out of the same womb, only a few months apart." Paddy just stared at her as if she might be a vixen in her own right, but he'd never mention it.

"Yes, its true. Gemma's mother could have litters."

"Yeah?" Paddy winced. "What the fuck does that have anything to do with me?"

"You know what they used to do to unwanted children in these parts." Neve's bewitching eyes over came him. He thought he might choke. "They lived with the wolves."

Paddy backed away. What the fuck was she getting at? That he had been unwanted? It didn't set well with him, at all.

it couldn't be boring

2010-06-12T01:00:00.015-05:00

Gemma neglected the fact that this was highly unlikely Lyle's baby. She wanted it to be his. Really, she did. She didn't want to have anything to do with Fletch or anyone else in the band now. As it was, Ian seemed to think it was all her fault about the glitch keeping the band from any gigs, all because of that shit, she was tied up with Robby Mac, the music producer.

Naturally, she neglected to dwell on this, as well. After all, Lyle had washed his hands of the Robby Mac fiasco. Besides, they were in Cecil's flat now. Although, it was quite small, and there was Lyle's mother with her so called surprise (their babe in the oven) to think about. Was their really enough room? Really?

Well, she'd just go with the flow. Hang on to Lyle. They were beautiful together. And perhaps they didn't have that much money, but still, this was a happy time. Now wasn't it?

So she let her sister make over her. And it was even better when Rupert showed up with Soren so she could show off her Lyle.

"I thought you told me he was a puff." Rupert said to her once they were alone, but Lyle wasn't that far away.

"Shh..not so loud." Gemma gave him a stern look.

"What? You cured him?" Rupert scowled.

"Shut it! Please, I've done nothing to him. Suppose that old lover of his burned him good." She winced.

"As in a disease?" Rupert gave her a painful wince.

"No, you idiot. He just hates him." Gemma looked back at him just as painful.

"Oh." Rupert looked at her blankly.

"So what do you think?" Gemma hoped he approved.

"What does it matter, what I think?" Rupert was kind of soured.

"Well, you and Soren are just lovely." Gemma regretted not telling him sooner.

"Look, as long as you're happy, that's all that matters." Rupert told her.

She would be if she didn't have the lies to contend with.

a little shout out now

2010-06-08T03:55:00.008-05:00

At least Gemma was there with her new hubby to help soften the blow when Simon told Kelsy and Colin about his marriage to Paddy.

"I can't believe all this fuck'n marriage shit!" Of course, when Kelsy said it, Simon wasn't sure if she were pleased or on the outs with it. "What ever got into your silly heads?"

"Why you of course," Gemma smiled. "And the baby."

"What?" Kelsy winced while everyone shot Gemma a look.

"Why yes, we're having a little one." She practically cooed in Lyle's arms.

"So many new people." Simon whispered to Paddy as if he didn't know anyone. Which reminded him of what he saw down at the Black Cat. Even Josh seemed to be fancying someone new.

"Isn't that a good thing." Paddy put his arm around Simon that they were just as well as the likes of anyone in the room. He guessed they were, but seriously, he just wanted to move his family elsewhere than to be stuck in Kelsy's home. She would always be ruling the roost. Now wouldn't she?

in a little padded room

2010-06-05T02:49:00.018-05:00

Ste was not amused at the men and white coats coming to get him.

"What the fuck do you want!" They carted him away in a straight jacket after they gave him a shot in the butt. Really, it was not a fun thing, and he was kicking and screaming all the way until the sedative set in. And then he felt as if he were in quick sand. He could not move. He might as well have been a worm oozing around on a parking lot after a rain storm. He didn't know where in the hell he was. But a padded room of some sort.

Finally, sleep set in and he was dreaming of gumdrops on a tree in the park. It was so serene and everyone was happy. Well, it could have been that way, but he didn't feel at all a part of it. He squinted hard. He felt so tight and miserable. Would he always be an animal to everyone? To everyone?

"Ste! Ste! Are you awake?" It sounded so demanding. Someone was pulling his eyelid up to look at his eyeball. Ste shook with a cringe then.

"Let me out of here!" He tried to scream.

"Oh, its OK. Just need to see if you are with us, or somewhere else." The doctor was all grins.

Ste wanted so badly to be somewhere else. Even in prison. The meals weren't completely rotten. At least he was fed on time, and he could watch something on cable through the bars. He didn't even have that at home.

"What do you want from me!" Ste grunted.

"Now, just relax. Its not that I think you're an animal. Really." The doctor kept smiling, but Ste looked at him as if he were an evil mad scientist.

a really lovely thing

2010-05-30T02:27:00.025-05:00

Josh was beginning to think something was strange in the air. All these people ready to start crime. Lovers at that. He winced as he looked back at Soren and Rupert arguing. He introduced himself to this lawyer they spoke of.

"They're just kids." This Fang was a right smart looker. He was definitely not a kid. Mature. Just the way Josh wished his life could be.

"I have a problem." He told him about Ste then. His friend. "Honestly, I don't think he ever was rehabilitated as he should be, and well, he had-had an episode of some sort. I really think he needs a psychological evaulation."

Within minutes Fang was on his cell speaking to important people. Josh was impressed. He couldn't help but smile.

"Its good as done." Fang promised. "Now how about a steak. Lets see if Soren knows anything he's doing."

Josh sighed with a smile. This was just what he needed. Someone to take his mind off his troubles with Ste.

"I can't believe it. Just a phone call or two?" Josh kept staring at Fang. How was that possible? He was having nightmares how he would have to scream in court how they'd been so unfair with Ste. And now he was getting help.

They ordered the specials. Rare steak. Lots of ale to drink with it. A side salad and of course chips.

Fang kept telling Josh how Ste must be grateful to have someone like him in his life. Josh listened, but he kept studying Fang who was rather flawless. He had a great job. He kept himself fit. Josh didn't know anyone like that existed, except on the tele.

Just then he saw Simon and Paddy come in. Ready to celebrate. They were excited about something. Josh almost lost his appetite thinking what that might be. Suddenly, he felt miserable. He tried to listen to Fang go on about his studies an where he'd been in the states.

He looked up at Simon then. How could he have done such a thing. Married. To Paddy. It was as if Paddy was just as much trouble as Ste. He just knew it. Josh was just glad it was Simon in that mess instead of himself.

getting no where

2010-05-27T01:25:00.013-05:00

"Soren knows of a lawyer." Rupert was quick to pick out Fang when Josh came around for a drink at the Black Cat.

"Jesus, Rup, must you?" Soren looked at Rupert that he didn't want to get into this.

"What? You've had some troubles, too?" Josh winced.

"No, just an old mate from school." Soren shrugged.

"More like old lover." Rupert was snide. He just couldn't help it.

"Quit it, will ya." Soren fretted.

"Fang? What sort of name is that?" Josh was concerned.

"Just a kiddie's name that stuck, thats all." Soren nodded. He looked up to see Fang coming through the door.

"Well, go get him." Rupert coaxed.

"You go get him." Soren quipped.

"Fine." Josh stomped off to see to him.

"Don't mess with me," fussed Soren.

"What are you gonna do to me?" Rupert got in his face.

"I'd like to beat the shit out of you, but it would do neither of us any good, now would it? And I don't want to go to jail for giving you a good beat'n." Soren got off his chair then and went to the kitchen to get back on with the dishes.

Rupert just stared at him. He was not scared of Soren in the least.

technically speaking

2010-05-22T02:27:00.000-05:00

Josh couldn't believe it when Ste didn't come home. He didn't even know Ste was mad. Actually.

He was being his loud self. Josh thought nothing of it. He just wanted him to cool it. There was no way they could start a family. Ste was enough to take care of. It would be like giving a gorilla a baby to play with. Well, maybe not that harsh, but still, Ste had his ups and downs. True, he hadn't been awful as of late, but no one knew when something might set him off. And obviously, something had when he got the call from the coppers. They had Ste in the slammer.

"What are you doing?" Josh was about to melt down when he saw Ste in the cell.

"Whats it to you, what I do?" Ste was his calloused self. Josh hardly knew this side of him.

"What's it to me! Good God, Ste! What's gotten in to you?" Josh winced there at the station. Something had happened. It was as if he'd reverted back to that old pattern of his. Just a thug, at heart. As far as Josh was concerned, Ste had gone mental. He needed help. Josh needed to find a good lawyer and fast. He needed to find someone who wouldn't lose him in the system.

no secret

2010-05-18T02:15:00.029-05:00

"Are you sure you're ready for the look on their faces." Paddy beamed.

"Yes." Simon smiled back as he eyed their rings once more. It was a wedding band set in white gold. Each had their names on them. Together. Forever. It had just been a civil union ceremony with a few strangers around close to the beach. But it was quite simple and lovely. And it was done. Practically a marriage.

But there was a part of Simon who wondered if he was seriously breathing. They'd taken the plunge. So quickly. Not like with Josh where one day he wanted to while the next day..why bother. Really, this was the future. And he wanted a partner. He did.

And he needed all he needed to know about Paddy the last few days. It was great. And he was in love. Not with just Paddy's smile, or his fit bod, but with his soul. Yeah, it was so intense with him. Knowing his past, wanting a better future with him. He knew he wanted to... for Sid, his son, to have someone like Paddy in his life. What more could he ask for. He was happy. He was finally happy and he didn't give a damn what anyone said about it, either.

"You know, some flatmates I used to live with this, did this too. But I think we were much more romantic, going sea-side and all." Simon told Paddy as they sat there on the train ride back.

"You're sure, it was the right thing?" Paddy's sincere eyes looked into Simon's.

"Yes, why not?" Simon wondered what Paddy was thinking. "Do you think it was right?"

"Yes, of course. I love you. I want to be there for you. I can't think of any place I'd rather be." His words were a comfort to Simon. They kissed then as if they couldn't just keep this to themselves. Simon could hardly wait to tell them the news when they got home.

say it ain't so

2010-05-14T05:57:00.000-05:00

"What the fuck do you mean, going all girly on me, like that?" Soren wouldn't let it go.

Rupert couldn't say what quite happened. He just felt like it.

"Don't- don't call me that." Rupert winced They were back at their room. Both were in a huff.

"Guess, you've been around those queens too long, aye." Soren got in his face, all squinty.

"You don't even know what the shit, you're going on about." Rupert shot back. He was just trying to side track him. "What sort a mother calls her son, Fang!"

"OH COME ON!" Soren threw his hands in the air.

"I dunno." Rupert shook his head. "How come you neglected to tell me about this old flame of yours?"

"Shut it!" Soren gave him a harsh look then as he stabbed his index finger into Rupert's chest. "He was never my boyfriend. We were mates."

"Well, I can see there was something more. There was, wasn't there, Soren!" Rupert wasn't backing down. "The way he looks at you. That longing gaze. There was something more!" Rupert was sure of it.

"OK, we may have snogged, on occasion." Soren squinted hard.

"ON OCCASION!" Rupert couldn't help himself.

"He, he might. We might have experimented a little." Soren shook his head. "I was in school. There were parties." Soren sat down on the bed, miserably.

"So you're trying tell me..he was your Tony Stoneham, was he?" Rupert could see it in his head. The two of them. Together.

"What?" Soren winced.

"You know, Like Skins." Rupert told him. "You were his Maxxie, weren't you?"

Soren blew out a breath.

"Maybe I was," Soren said. "But still."

"What? He's in love with you." Rupert fretted.

"He's got a wife and kid." Soren informed him. "He's history."

"You think?" Rupert eased up then as he neared Soren who took both his hands. "He's not like us. He's got a fat trust fund to fall back on, and he doesn't even know if he has any mates. That's the kind of mate he is. Never knowing if he's even there for you, or not."

Rupert felt bad now that he'd been such a dick.

"You know you're the one." That's all Soren had to say as his forehead touched Rupert's. He kissed Rupert then as if this was meant to be.

a bit of a fuss

2010-05-11T01:44:00.018-05:00

Ste strolled the night as if he owned it. A smile came to his smooth face as he headed from one street light to another. Unkowning what to do. But had it. Had his switch blade with him. Funny, how he'd hidden it so long from Josh, who didn't know he owned one. Really, he wasn't sure where it came from, but it was truly like an old friend ready to do his dirty work for him.

Ste felt as if he were on autopilot, for some reason. There was nothing to think on. Just do. Now. Not like a bank job where you worked weeks to think up how to get to a place a certain time. Have everything lined up like a recipe for a birthday cake. You just went in. Got wha you wanted. And got out. Simple. Quite simple, indeed.

There was the liquor store on the corner. Not really that busy. Just a few. Old woman getting her Mogan David. The bastards just coming off their shift to take wine home for the wife or Scotch for themselves. It was not a bad time to be in the liquor store. So Ste went in to do his business.

Which meant. Grabbing the old woman, promising he'd slit her throat if he didn't get the cash. He held her tight. He thought how hard his teeth gnashed. They might tumble out. There was no time for mistakes. He made the old witch promised not to move.

"Now don't be a bitch now." He whispered. Holdering her tighter waiting for the cash to stuff in the inside of his green Army jacket. "I'll be on my way."

Shit, if she didn't pee on his pants.

"Fuck!" Ste's face tense. "I should slit that wrinkled throat of yours!" But he threw her to the ground instead. Snatched the cash and bottle of gin and took off running.

Finally, he felt the cold of the night and it was fresh and so redeeming. Except for the wet spot on his thigh that started out like warm soup was now like ice. He winced the thought of some poor old woman's piss on him. Disgusting.

But he opened the gen and started to drink. He felt himself shaking inside as if he could not possibly hold it together. Only the gen could keep him calm. He needed to stay calm.

not tonight

2010-05-08T01:07:00.005-05:00

"Fang?" Soren could hardly believe it. "Is it you?" He hadn't seen him in ages. Fang was a grade or two a head of him in school. Soren expected he'd moved to the states. A big shot now, lawyer type. "What are you doing in Hollyoaks?"

"Can't I see a mate?" Fang looked shocked that Soren would even bother why he was back.

"Sure, of course."

"I heard by mouth you're giving the Black Cat an upgrade." Fang smiled.

"I wouldn't say that. That would be cousin's doing." Soren couldn't dare take credit for it. He just made do with what Colin gave him and only hoped the patrons would enjoy eating it as much as he enjoyed preparing it.

Soren looked around, hoping he'd see Rupert but he saw him nowhere.

"I was hoping you to meet my boyfriend." Soren finally looked back at Fang.

"You? A boyfriend." Fang gave him an open smile. "Now that's a laugh." And he did so.

Soren gave him a glare to shut it while he looked one more time to spot Rupert at the back booth.

He went over to see what he was doing. Rupert always waited at the bar for him. "Babe, what are you doing?" He winced. He looked to be getting drunk. A way ahead of him. "You know how you are when you've had one to many."

"Why would I know," Rupert was being all snide as if he didn't have the time of day now for Soren, who crossed his arms and gave Rupert a perturbed look.

"There's someone I want you to know." Soren kept glaring thinking this was not a good time for Rupert to act like a prick. "He's one of my oldest mates."

"Dearest too, I guess." Rupert looked over to Fang.

"Please, don't be a prick." Soren kept his eye on Rupert as Fang walked up.

"Fang, this is Rupert." Soren told him then.

"Oh, hullo." Rupert managed a silly smile. This was not like Rupert at all, thought Soren, who just squinted at him to knock off the silly sassy voice of his.

on impulse

2010-05-04T02:48:00.022-05:00

Before Rupert knew it, Ste was gone. Drank up his drinks and left. Rupert guessed he went to the loo. Didn't really care. He had his own luv to wait for. He'd be off in an hour. Rupert, bit his lip thinking of Soren. Probably would smell of grilled steaks and onions. He'd have that white uniform on. A chef's coat. Soren's cousin, Colin wanted them to look professional. Chef hat included. He knew Soren didn't much care for it. He'd be a bit sweaty and salty under his clothes. But Rupert didn't seem to mind. He liked him that way. A bit spicey to the tongue, but definitely, he was worth it. Every night and morning. in fact. It was beginning to become their lovely tradition. And Rupert could hardly wait to see him.

But just then he heard someone ask for Soren at the end of the bar. Rupert ear's pricked as he looked at the bloke questioning the bartender about Soren. He wanted to know the hours he worked and would he mind if he had a word with him.

Naturally, the bartender told him that they were still serving up grub. He'd have to wait. There were orders to be filled. Rupert didn't know exactly what to make of this because, in spite of how nice the bloke was dressed. Suited up for corporate, no doubt. There was this insistence. A demanding look, perhaps. He wanted to see Soren now.

Rupert felt like a fool. Not sure to lash out at the possible wanker or run and hide. He decided he'd get in the corner and spy. No need to make the situation worse. Possibly, the suit didn't like the food. Thats what this was about. So Rupert nursed on his lager and waited.

Soon enough, after this wanker being so damn testy, Soren came out from the kitchen. All in white. Not a crumb or a grease mark on him and greeted this suit. Rupert glared as he watched them embrace. The block was all smiles. Soren was too. It was sickening, in fact.

Rupert did not like it one bit when the bloke kissed Soren on the cheek. It really did not sit well with him, yet he didn't move from the back booth, either.

the motion of the emotion

2010-05-02T01:22:00.004-05:00

Ste put his dish in the sink. It clanked with a shrill note. He stomped down the hall to open the bedroom door but it was locked.

"I don't believe you." Ste fretted outside of the door. "You, scared of me? Is that what its all about?" Ste gritted then.

It was quiet.

"JESUS! Its true then!" He was in a huff. He grabbed his jeans and slid into Josh's shirt and took the pack of cigarettes with him as he went downstairs to the pub. He'd need an ale and lager to think. Side by side. Maybe.

He popped the cigarette in his mouth at the bar.

"Shit, Ste, you know we're smoke free." Kieron said from behind the counter.

"Shut it." Ste scowled as he leaned over his drinks. "I'll tuck it away. Save keeping. Promise." He looked at Kieron out of the corner of his eye, wondering if he should ask an old lover a thing or two about himself. "Aye, can you clarify something for me, please?" He motioned for Kieron to come back.

"What is it?" He still had the stature and the concern of a priest even if he wasn't one, anymore.

"Was I hard on you?" Kieron squinted with a scowl.

"Hard on me?" He had Kieron cracking up.

"You know what I mean?" Ste was serious.

"I was never afraid of you." Kieron nodded.

Ste sipped his drink then. He wouldn't think anymore about being a shit to anyone. If Kieron wasn't afraid. Why would Josh be? He turned to see Rupert coming in to the Black Cat.

"You aren't working tonight?" Ste motioned for another lager. This time he had a drink for Rupert.

"It was slow, and I felt like leaving after the first part. Couldn't handle another parade tonight." He sighed.

"You look like shit." Ste grinned.

"Yeah, I could use a good sleep." Rupert yawned with a nod.

"So you and Soren, flying high, aye?" He got a whiff of the ganga on Rupert.

"Shut it." Rupert grinned. "We're doing great. Everything is great."

"Is it?" Ste moved back and forth on his rotating seat. "Me, man, thinks I'm twisted."

"But aren't you?" Rupert shrugged as he took a big sip of his drink.

"I was, possibly, but you know, thats history. Not with Josh. Its different with him." Ste empted the glass of ale and drank at his lager then. "You know, I wouldn't hit him. I wouldn't."

"Why are you telling me this?" Rupert looked at him.

"Because I'm not like that other person. The one who beat the crap out the likes of small individuals as yourself, and then fucked them." Ste nodded.

"I don't think I want to know that person, Ste." Rupert shook his head, no.

"Then how come thats the first person Josh sees when he sees me?" Ste gave Rupert a soured frown then. "He doesn't trust me." He shook his head. "How come I didn't know, until now?"

Rupert drank at his lager. No one had a straight answer for him.

an ugly thought

2010-04-25T01:08:00.003-05:00

Josh got the letter in the mail, giving him the date that he and Simon could get married in France.

He rolled his eyes. He'd forgot how they'd filled out paperwork and the like just to wait months to find out if they could do it. Supposedly, it was faster now for such an event.

"What's that?" Ste wanted to know. He was in the kitchen just in his briefs frying an egg for a sandwich.

"Just crap." Josh shrugged. Of course, Ste had to go to investigate.

"Don't look at it. Its nothing!" Josh swelled a frown.

"Jesus, you'd think it was a big secret with all that yelping." Ste gave him a scowl, but had supper ready soon enough in their little eat-in kitchen.

"Just nothing, all right." Josh didn't want to talk about it.

"Whatever." Ste ate at the messy sandwich while Josh bit into a chip.

"I dunno why folks think marriage is the key, anyway." Josh shrugged.

"What?" Ste winced.

"You know, how this marriage shit is all glorious for every one of us." Josh was bitter.

"Josh, when did you get so- I dunno. A bit mad, if you ask me." Ste licked the yolk from his fingers then. "If you want a family, then marriage is the start, don't you think?"

"Don't want to talk about it." Josh scowled. He bit into his sandwich and the yolk squirted down his sleeve. He made a face then, disgusted with the mess. He went to clean up.

"Aye, when did your panties get in such a wad and made you such a pisser." Ste gave him a soured look.

"We're not getting married." Josh informed him. "If that's what you're asking."

"I'm not asking," Ste gave him a glare. "I'm saying if I mean anything to you, you'd do it without a second thought." He pursed his lips then and cleaned his plate with the bread and ate what was left of the bacon. "You think to much, you know it. Not surprised if you don't have one of those brain cramps that causes and infection in your head!"

Josh went into his room then and slammed the door shut. Ste was getting to intense for him.

as plain as day

2010-04-22T01:47:00.000-05:00

"I just don't want you feeling woeful for me." Paddy squinted hard. Of course, he'd just pressed himself deep inside Simon. As if was he was about to cave into bliss, but he knew this was more than just fucking with Simon.

His heart wavered silently. He had nothing to lose, now did he? He'd just have to find a way to be good to Simon. He was different from the others. Just had to get his act in order. Thats all. And as he finished up, he didn't let it make him blue that he might not be on the up and up with Simon. Still there was a lot he'd told him that was true.

Paddy dislodged himself then and fell next to Simon in a cool sweat. They kissed then as if this was always meant to be. Always.

"I'm certainly not feeling sorry for you in the least." Simon grinned. "It doesn't really matter what Kelsy might fuss about. We can find our own place."

Paddy liked that idea. He did want Simon all to himself. What was even more of laugh was the thought everyone would think Simon wasn't the wife, but deep down Paddy knew better. Just a little secret, he'd keep to himself.

its settled

2010-04-18T01:37:00.017-05:00

Neve was proud of herself. She got Lyle to do the right thing. Of course, she didn't know why this was all important to her, so suddenly. Family. Naturally, a decade or more ago, she was all for free love and the like. Of course, she'd had her share of it. As it was though, it was a good thing. Showing up at the wedding court, rings an all, a daisy chain around her head, to make it official.

She was finally a married lady. Cecil had been down the isle once himself. It was short lived, but this time, it would be different. She was 49 and time to settle down. And it seemed splendid to do it with Cecil. She'd talked Lyle and Gemma in to it. Sort of dare. She guessed. But it was enough to celebrate about. Only she couldn't drink and that was terrible. But she was happy. Lyle was happy. And of course, Cecil was ecstatic. They were moving back to his place in Hollyoaks.

"Now, it won't be fab or anything." He explained. "I hear my ex is on tour with a poker tournament so that won't be a problem." Of course, she made him laugh when he told her Ingrid was with a much older bloke. So much older than Neve.

As it was she'd rented out her flat to one of her many gay friends, Georgie, who had been waiting years to have it. He promised, he'd keep her museum in tact. After all, she still had the love letters Mick had sent her so long ago. Framed, of course. Right on the wall. After all, Neve was only bringing her essentials in her old suitcase. It was all that she needed. She was ready to start a new life in Hollyoaks.

old news

2010-04-15T03:17:00.022-05:00

"You're really sweet to me, you know," Paddy said on their train ride to the beach. It was sunny out and it was nice to get away for a bit.

"I had some days to take on holiday, you know." Simon didn't want to act like it was an act of congress to do so. Especially, with Kelsy. Actually, he'd left her a voice message, and they were on their way. It was OK at the library. It wasn't terribly busy yet.

Paddy seemed upset though.

"What is it?" Simon looked at him.

"Nothing."

"Come on, you can tell me anything." Simon promised him as they were lulled in their seats by the rhythm of the train.

"Right." Paddy didn't smile though. "Me, mum's worse, than I said." He almost choked on his words.

"Really?"

"God, I wish I could be straight with you about it, but as it is, can't even be straight with myself." He sighed. "See we sold the house and all, so she could be put in the home. And, well, I lived there. Helped out a good bit. The kitchen. There were other old farts I had to deal with too. I lived in the shed. Actually." He was quiet then as if he might be fighting tears. "I have no place there now. Since mum passed."

"What?" Simon winced. "What are you telling me?"

"I'm just a drifter, Simon. You've got no business being with me. You deserve better." Tears came to Paddy's eyes then.

Simon put his around him, hugged him close. Simon thought he might cry too, but he knew where he wanted to be. He wanted to be with Paddy.

just a bit of luck

2010-04-12T03:09:00.000-05:00

Paddy didn't see a need in trying to get to know Maxie and his family. As it was Maxie had no time for him and he guessed that would have to be all right. Instead, he had been smitten when it came to Simon. He so felt like wasting another day in the village, hoping it might be something to remind him that he was still a part of the living and not having to listen to the loons with foreboding clairvoyances back at the home where his mother stayed. He knew she wouldn't know him when he got back. He could see her three times a days and she'd still not remember him.

Yet, he didn't know if he wanted to go back to the Black Cat or anywhere near there. Kelsy didn't trust him. He didn't know what he did. Stealing food, perhaps. Shit, he thought it was Simon's home, too. But perhaps it best if he just stayed away or if they did meet up, not to hang out there. Or if, such an occasion might arise, well, likely it wouldn't, but spend the night in a room somewhere. Just didn't know if he could afford it. After all, he was on Ian's couch.

So there he was out setting up a game of chess in the park when Simon dropped by, alone to sit with him.

"I thought you'd left." Simon sat down at the game.

"Soon," Paddy said as he looked up at Simon while setting up the pieces.

"Glad you're still around." Simon smiled.

"Are you now?" Paddy bit a smile too.

"Didn't know you played?" Simon helped with the pieces.

"Yeah, not very often, though."

"Josh, was never into the game much. He said I beat him too often." Simon told him. Paddy only gave him a look as if who in the hell was that. "Sorry, my ex, he lives just downstairs from me."

"Does this mean you visit him, occasionally?" Paddy questioned.

"Hardly." Simon shrugged. "We work at the library. I don't even see him there. I'm a cataloguer and he works circulation. And aside from the fact he has someone new in his life."

"I see." Paddy looked at the pieces. Really, he didn't want to play the game. Not today. Not when he could think of so many other things he could be doing with Simon. "So are you free right now?"

"I believe so." Simon shrugged.

"What are we fucking doing here, then?" Paddy grinned. "Shouldn't we go where no one knows us. You know. Get out of town. Perhaps the shore."

"We could take the train." Simon nodded.

"What a lovely idea." Paddy was up for that.

what the queen bee wants

2010-04-10T03:00:00.016-05:00

"Honestly, Kel, did you have to be so hard on him?" Simon was not amused with her shenanigans with Paddy. She was such a bitch at breakfast. All snooty like. As if you'd have to be somebody rich before she'd have a thing to do with you. It wasn't like the Kelsy he knew.

"I don't like your attitude." She snarled while they were folding baby clothes.

"I don't care for yours, either." Simon scowled back. "You have no right to be-"

"Well, I don't want my child around any Tom, Dick or Harry." She shot back.

"Paddy is practically family." Simon lit into her.

"Really? Since when?" She glared at him as she flung a cloth nappy at him.

"You know what I mean. He's Maxie's brother." Simon told her.

"So that's what its all about. Can't have Max, so you'll settle with Padraic." Kelsy shrugged.

"Quit twisting it all around, will you!" Simon looked at her bitter. "Let it alone." He was soured with this conversation and Sid started to cry. He went to him. It felt to him he was sentenced to a little room at the end of the hall and the only person who he was supposed to be with was just a baby... who still enjoyed his mum's tits most nights.

thinking back on it

2010-04-09T02:47:00.026-05:00

"Really, I dunno how it happened?" Gemma looked at the test again. They were at the doctor's office a few days later.

"Don't be daft with me, please." Lyle winced. "You are a smart lass. We had sex, what do you think?"

"Just like that, though." It was an awful lot to absorb. The two of them had created something. It wasn't exactly like planting tulips. She smiled with a shrug then. At least it was with Lyle. No need to worry about the hanky panky from before with..what were their names? It was just a blur then. Just some fun, she'd never mention again. After all, Lyle had met most of her criteria, except for having the boyfriend, once upon a time. But that had burned him good, and this was a fresh start for the both of them.

"What shall we do?" She wanted to know.

"Do you love it here? London, I mean?" He looked at her as if he'd go anywhere she wanted.

"Not really, I mean, its a fine place to shop and see the sights, but honestly, its too expensive here on a daily basis." She nodded. If he'd asked her this a year ago she would have told him it was fantastic and that she never wanted to be anywhere else. Now it was just growing old on her. She wanted to get back and see her sis, Kelsey and the pub and even Ian and the rest of the boys in the band.

"A bit much it is." He agreed. "Ever since Mum mentioned moving back to Hollyoaks, I've been thinking of wanting to go too. I don't know if I remember it a bit. Who knows, she might wise up and tell me who my Dad is. Maybe he's still there."

"Yeah, but that messy contract with your boss. Its kind of stand still, isn't it?" She winced.

"Its just shitty business. And I don't want a part of it. I want to be with you. And I've saved loads, you know. We could get by. I'd find something to do." He promised.

"I was a nanny one summer. I went Greece, that way." She offered.

"But you're pregnant." He reminded her.

She supposed being a rock star was on hold for good now.

"We'll think of something." She sighed. It was as if they had all the time in the world now to think. Something was bound to come along.

in the realm of it

2010-04-08T01:17:00.019-05:00

"Jesus! Are you all right in there?" Lyle banged on the bathroom door then. It was quiet. He hoped she hadn't fainted. For the life of him, he didn't know what to make of the situation. The pregnancy test didn't match up to any indication of mother nature.

They'd been so happy about it, that..well, he liked to think it wasn't much to it now. But yes, they'd played around a bit themselves. And one thing had lead to another. He wanted to say it was a one off. Only, the one off had lasted about three days of bliss.

Yes, it was true, he'd let himself go. And it had been amazingly great. He wanted to think it was more than just fucking. Because it was. He really felt he knew her now. She was so much more to him than a flat-mate. And he thought he could fall asleep with her anywhere and be at home. Sleep was so much better. Of course, it was fun getting to the sleep, naturally.

"I'm just fine." She didn't sound well.

"Really, Gemma, you need to see doctor." Perhaps a strange flu was going around.

"Tea and honey." Neve told him that would help.

"Mum, she just had tea." Lyle winced.

"Not with honey." Neve went to make some.

Lyle felt more alienated from his job the more he was with Gemma, but he didn't know if he could survive without it. He wanted to get out of the business. Go somewhere with Gemma, far from the city, to start a new life.

beside the point

2010-04-07T01:09:00.013-05:00

Neve could see that Lyle was disheartened. As if she'd pulled his heart out and stomped on it with delight.

"Jesus, Lyle, don't be such a baby. Didn't raise you that way, did I?" Neve was ready to tell that boy where to go. "You have a life. I have one too. Not like you're over but every blue moon, as it is."

"All right." He was cold though.

"You've been working too hard, you know that." Neve informed him as she had them in the kitchen now, eating her scones and a good cup of brew to get them started.

"I guess."

"Shit," Neve snapped. "This bloke never gets a holiday off, you know that? Gemma, if you're around long enough, you'll know what that arse of a boss of his is like."

"Yeah, I know." Gemma just grinned as she stuffed down the lemon poppy scones.

"He's a prick, all right." Cecil agreed, looking at Lyle, who set there gazing at the food as if he couldn't eat a bit.

"Mum, just shut it, will you." Lyle's brow furrowed.

"These are quite delicious." Gemma then said about the scones, but in the next minute Gemma was hurrying to the loo to throw it all up.

"Should there be something to worry about, Lyle?" Neve wanted to know.

Lyle only sighed and went to check on Gemma.

around about way

2010-04-06T01:00:00.020-05:00

"Fuck!" Gemma found herself almost laughing. What was Cecil doing here?

"Get out of town!" Cecil shot back, but he didn't care if Gemma saw him practically in the buff. He was armoured in his tattoos that stretched from one arm to the next.

"You and Lyle's mum?" She winced.

"Lyle?" Cecil didn't see the connection as he stood there, unaware that he might look as if he were on display.

"Yeah, the stylist I've been staying with." Gemma shrugged. Although, you wouldn't know it. She was pretty much miss matched. Her thigh highs didn't even match. One gray and one black. She'd actually dressed in the dark. Lyle had been so stressed over his mum's secret that she was keeping from him that Gemma had stumbled to keep up with him back at his place. He had said he'd go alone, but she thought he might lose it, if he did.

"Oh." Cecil nodded. He finally went back to get on his jeans. He was still barefooted. By then, Lyle found him.

"Uh, this- this is my-brother." Gemma grinned.

"Cousin." Cecil clarified.

"Something like that." Gemma couldn't be sure.

"See," Neve laughed. "We're all family." Neve looped one arm around Lyle's and the other around Cecil's.

things change

2010-04-05T02:51:00.012-05:00

Was it true? Lyle wasn't going to be quiet about it until his mother, aka Neve told him the truth. He showed up with Gemma at his mother's flat in the old town area. Supposedly, this was where Sweeney Todd came about, but he'd never know it. Although the brownstone was ancient, and she rented out a spot on the top floor that was jammed packed with her rockn'roller shit she'd saved over the years.

Gemma was having a good time, taking it all in the livingroom, while he chatted it up with mum about her new predicament.

"I thought I might want to go back to Hollyoaks." She shrugged as if it were no concern of his.

"Did ya now?" Lyle fretted. He'd spent a few years there himself, but they'd packed up and left by the ripe age of four or so, he thought. He thought she never wanted to go back. "What the fuck is in Hollyoaks?"

"I dunno. It would be, like home." She told him. "And that's where I would want the baby to be."

"So its fine and dandy for a baby, but not for me?" This pissed Lyle.

"Well, it was stressful then. But things have changed." She'd made scones and offered him a plate of them, but he wasn't hungry.

"I don't even know you, anymore." Lyle crossed his arms. He knew they'd been so close. Always. But that had not been enough.

Just then he noticed a scrawny, reptile of a human just in his nickers strolling down the hall. Lyle squinted hard then. Was this the father of her baby?

setting him straight

2010-04-04T02:31:00.031-05:00

Kelsy wasn't exactly sure what to think when she found someone with Simon.

"He was over the whole night!" Kelsy went to Colin about it, who was already up with the babies.

"And?" Colin almost smiled, but he was busy making sure the kiddies were clean and happy.

"Who the fuck is he?" Kelsy didn't like strangers in the house.

"Babe, I'm sure Simon knows him. He wouldn't just let anyone in, besides, he needs friends, you know." Colin shrugged as he went on to change Nancy's nappy.

"More like, lover." Kelsy fumed.

"Don't let it get to you," Colin said. "Just talk to him if you're worried."

"Right." She'd play nice. Make breakfast. She guessed the bloke could join them. She went to the kitchen then to start a brew when she found the bloke in just his nickers, digging through the fridge.

"Are you homeless?" She asked.

"Almost." The bloke looked up at her who was about to pop a red grape in his mouth.

"What are you to Simon?" She wanted him to spit it out. Now. She got the kettle on and told him to get out the eggs and sausage for her.

"I dunno. Nothing much, I guess." The bloke shrugged.

She looked him over, noticed his resemblance to Maxie. Was that what it was? Simon wanted his own Maxie for himself. She knew something happened when Simon went to Spain to get Maxie that time. God, Simon was mad about Maxie, and he had to find himself someone, who looked like his Maxie. The thoughts churned in her head.

"I doubt you mean nothing to him." She glared back at him as she got the skillet ready. "Who are you?"

"Maxie's brother. Paddy." He said so solemn as if he knew she'd been thinking the same thing.

"Maxie, aye? Why aren't you over at their kitchen, scrounging?" She gave him an ominous gaze.

"Because, I'm an intrusion there, I suppose." Paddy slightly smiled. "Do you want me to leave?"

"No, I'd never hear the end of it from Simon." She started beating eggs then with a fury. "Besides, I'd never hear the end of it if I were evil to his guest. But just don't be shitty to him, now. He's hit a rough patch, you know. First Josh had to be prat over Sid, and then, he was happy with Benji. Only the bottom fell out of that when Benji got carted off to the slammer. So lets hope you are on the up and up with him. He's a sweetheart. Don't want to see him anymore broken than he already is."

Paddy bit his bottom lip then. He gave her a nod that he'd be on his best behavior.

it might be nice

2010-04-02T02:17:00.027-05:00

"Are you out of your fuck'n mind?" Thank God, Ste had waited afterwards to discuss this little venture of his with Josh or well, there would not have been any fucking to begin with. Josh laid with him in bed. He certainly wasn't up for any female around. And honestly, he didn't think he was the type with kiddies. Being a so called uncle to Amy's kiddies was enough for him. After all, if there ever was a kid to have to tend to, it was Ste. Possibly, his screws needed to be tighten in that head of his. No way were they getting involved in some sort of surrogate thing to obtain a family.

"I'm just thinking out loud. It might be nice." Ste wouldn't shut up.

"No. No. Don't want to hear it. Housing is shit here, and we live above a pub, you know." Josh shook his head.

"Yeah, and..and Simon is doing just fine. Look at Kel and Col, they love it here." Ste reminded him as he drew his finger down Josh's shoulder.

"Yeah, well, they own the establishment and Simon got lucky to be their sidekick, you know." Josh found himself saying, even if he did still envy his ex, Simon, when he didn't really mean too.

"You know, you wanna." Ste grinned.

"No, I don't." Josh knew he was the grownup in this. Too many obligations. It would not be good to start, something like this, especially if it burned you in the process.

"Don't get so cynical." Ste pursed his lips.

"Do you even know what that means?" Josh highly doubted, but they made up. Josh hoped there would be no more talk about starting a family.

invited

2010-03-30T01:37:00.056-05:00

Paddy really hadn't meant to invite himself over, but he was glad he did. He didn't exactly feel right at home with Ian anymore with Shou showing up. He felt like the 3rd wheel or something. Ian was definitely involved with Shou. Then there were the other guys who kept to themselves. Really, why had he came to Hollyoaks?

He certainly wasn't spending much of it with that snooty brother of his. Somehow, he felt left out of everything, lately. But here he was with Simon. A simple meal and wine.

"Seriously, how did this all come about?" Paddy wanted to know how he had his own place with the mother of his child and her husband.

"Seriously? A very bad New Year's eve party, I'm afraid." Simon confessed. "And the rest is history."

"History." They sat on the couch relaxing with what was left of the wine. Really, it was light and definitely, not going to either of their heads. Just time for a good conversation.

"Tell me, about you?" Simon looked at him.

"I think you can already tell, can't you?" Paddy laughed.

"OK," Simon smiled. "We pretty much know we're both gay. But you know, um, you have a boyfriend?"

"Goodness no." He winced. "I have my mother to care for, or did." He shrugged. "It was all a bit much. She had us when she was rather old, and now she has no memory of us, at all."

"That's so sad." Simon squinted with a tender emotion.

"We just get on with it. I can be silly with her, from time to time still. Some days, anyhow. Guess, I just needed a break, you know. Actually, I met Ian at this bar, and he said I could visit any time, but his boyfriend's back now. And it hasn't gone so well with Maxie." Paddy told him.

"Don't give up on your brother." Simon pushed his fingers back through his hair. "Do you want me to talk to him?"

Paddy shook his head, no. He wished he hadn't brought Maxie up.

"I should go." There was really nothing in Hollyoaks for him.

"No, stay. Its early yet." Simon told him.

"Its a long drive back. It'll be late when I get there." He shrugged.

"What?" Simon looked at him. "You're leaving, town?"

"What's the point?" Paddy winced. "My brother has his happily ever after, and I have a mum I need to get back too."

"I see." Simon stared at him intently. "Its just-" Simon studied paddy's face for a bit. "I wanted to at least do this-" Simon kissed Paddy then. "Before you left."

Paddy couldn't remember the last time he'd been kissed. He felt a bit clumsy, and when he kissed back, he practically fell on Simon.

"Are you sure you should be going anywhere?" Simon slightly teased. "I think you're drunk."

Paddy just smiled and let Simon find his lips, again.

favors and such

2010-03-28T01:02:00.017-05:00

Ste listen quite intently with Quentin at the bar in the Black Cat. He really was still pissed with John Paul. They'd been so close to adopting a baby girl from China.

"I could be a Dad right now." Quentin told him.

Ste just nodded. "Couldn't you have done it, yourself?" Ste wondered why he didn't.

"I suppose." Quentin shrugged.

"Then why, don't you?" Ste chewed at the tooth pick as he was cleaning at the bar as he served.

"It's lost its spunk right now. I wanted a family, you know. A real family." Quentin winced as he sipped his whiskey and soda.

"Gotcha." Ste slyly smiled. "See, I was thinking, if me and Josh could find us a lass we trust, both have a go at her and well, you know, let it happen, then we could raise the kid as our own."

"There could be some dire consequences, you know." Quentin told him.

"How so?" He couldn't think of it in that noggin of his. Seemed quite simple to him.

"Jealousy." Quentin nodded.

"You don't say." Ste just grinned. What an ugly word, he thought. Still, this was something to think on. Just who would she be who might do him and Josh a favor.

on a whim

2010-03-27T04:13:00.040-05:00

Simon was out in the shops with baby Sid. It was so much more of a cold winter wind than he expected. Naturally, he was frightened of baby slings and the like, these days, so he was holding on to Sid to make sure he was all right. Hoping this dreadful weather didn't hurt him.

Of course, he was trying to show the infant everything that Easter might have to offer. Sid's little baby blues took in everything. His little head wobbled, growing stronger everyday. There was a certain satisfaction Simon felt, yet he hated the thought of it being a selfish endeavor.

Just then he looked up and saw Maxie, an isle over, where the wine selections were.

"Where's Gracie?" He approached him then, wondering if he were an idiot bringing a baby out in this weather.

"I suppose she's cozy with her Mum and Dad."

Simon was startled when he realised it wasn't Maxie at all.

"Are you a friend of Maxie's?" The bloke smiled at him.

"Yeah, we go way back." Simon shrugged.

"Don't suppose he ever mentioned me." The bloke hugged himself as if he were bitter with someone. "I'm Maxie's brother, Paddy." He looked at Sid then and gave him a smile. "He's your spitting image, you know."

Simon just grinned.

"You look so much like Maxie." Simon then told him.

"Do I? Strange, folks say Maxie looks a lot like me, where I come from. Of course, they all know I have a brother, a factor that Maxie has longed neglected. I'm afraid." Paddy looked up at Simon.

"And why is that?" Simon winced.

"He hates me, Mum." Paddy told him.

"Really?" Simon had no idea. He'd never mentioned his mum.

"Yeah, see were split up when my parents called it quit. Maxie went with Dad and I stayed with Mum. The rest is history."

"Sorry."

"Aw, well, all grown up now and can't stand sight of each other. You'd think they meant to do it, you know." Paddy went back to looking at wines.

"You looking for anything in particular?" Simon looked at the wines too.

"Me, Mum's birthday is coming up. Thought I'd get her nice Lexia. Its no more that pop, you know, she likes it sweet." Paddy smiled.

"I hope you find it." Simon had to find Sid's pacifier. He was getting fussy.

"Can't say I have."

Paddy pulled a bottle of pink wine from the shelves then.

"Would like some?" Paddy offered.

"Oh, I couldn't." Simon shook his head, no.

"We could share a bottle. Not like I'd be putting you under. Really isn't potent, if you know what I mean, you do drink, don't you?" Paddy looked him over.

"Of course."

"Well, a friend of Maxie's is a friend of mine." Paddy smiled.

Simon smiled.

"All right. I got some steaks I could put on the grill, if you'd like." Simon guess he could be a friend too. "Want to come home with us?" Naturally, Sid popped his pacifier out, right on the floor, and drooled down his shirt as if on command.

"Steak, sounds lovely. You've got your hands full, you know." Paddy told him.

"He's going back to his Mum's, so I'm free." Simon informed him.

"OK." Paddy picked up the pacifier, and held on to it as they started to pay for the wine.

no need to shout

2010-03-25T01:37:00.042-05:00

"You don't look like yourself, babe." Rupert said first thing when Soren came back with some snacks from the kitchen.

"Sebastian's missing." Soren bit into a biscuit and plopped down next to Rupert.

"How long?" Rupert looked at him then.

"Too long, seriously." Soren winced. He could barely swallow the left-overs from breakfast. He almost coughed it up.

"Did he have a row with Needy?" Rupert looked at Soren for answer.

"Might of." Soren couldn't help but think of Sebastian, who was more than family. He did fancy him at one time. "He's just, you know, 16, and..where in the hell is he?"

"He wasn't schizo or anything, right?" Rupert started throwing ideas out there.

"Right." Soren looked at him then, and nodded.

"You were sweet on him, weren't you?" Rupert glared at him.

"So." Soren squinted.

"If he wasn't your cousin, you'd be with him right this minute. That's it, isn't it?" Rupert squinted back.

"Dunno, about that." Soren didn't want to believe it. Really. Possibly. No, no, he wouldn't think like that. "What's ailing you, Ruppie? Really?" Truly, his boyfriend was giving him little to smile about at the moment as he scratched the back of his head in thought.

"I just have to wonder if you think of all your lovers when you're with me. Can't help it, all right." Rupert couldn't look him in the eye.

"You little shit! Look at me, will you?" Soren grabbed Rupert by the neck then. "Jealous much?"

"Sorry." Rupert looked at him nervously.

Soren's lower plump lip curled up. He plowed right into Rupert then, wrestling him to the floor. He knew he had him. He did, as he wrapped his arms around him. Soren couldn't resist to give him a big fat hickey on his neck.

not just family matters

2010-03-23T01:26:00.015-05:00

"Seriously, you've been gone forever." Rupert told Gemma when she called.

"Just a few weeks, luv." She was all chatty. He didn't want her to think he was in a bummer mood, but he felt to be a in a funk of some sort with his main squeeze, Soren.

Well, he could call him that. That were fucking now. And true, it was all so new to him. Rupert, didn't want to dare think of all Soren's sorted digressions.

"Right. Yes, sorry. But I-"

"You miss me!" Now she had a laugh. As if her dear sweet puff of a brother could dare shed an emotion.

"Yes, of course." Rupert bit a grin. "That's not actually it, though." He got comfy on his sofa, as he wondered if he could dare hold on to Soren.

"Come on, cleanse your mind, out with it, baby brother." Gemma was set to listen.

"I dunno where to start."

"Is something the matter? You and Soren getting on with it?" Gemma wanted to know.

"Yes." He sighed.

"You wouldn't be shit'n me, now would you. Is he sweet to you?" Gemma questioned.

"Naturally. The best." He first said. "But what do I know. I never been this far with anyone, Gem, ya know." Rupert winced.

"Stop thinking so much shit. If he makes you happy, then let it alone, will ya." Gemma's advice rang through his head. He supposed he was making a big deal about nothing. Perhaps.

"Right." Rupert nodded as if he could do that. He would.

"You spoke to your Dad, you know, about what you know now?"

"No." Rupert didn't feel like it. Didn't care what his arse of a dad had to say about his love in with his mother and his best friend. "Who does shit like that anymore."

"Rupert, don't be so judgemental. Will ya?" Gemma snapped.

Rupert smiled then. His sister was a trip, he thought with a sigh. If only he knew who his sis had been sleeping with.

"You sure that Lyle of yours is as gay as you think he is?" Rupert bit a grin. He had a feeling his sis wasn't telling him, everything.

a bite in the butt

2010-03-21T10:23:00.000-05:00

Josh could barely stand it, to see Simon so depressed. He saw him everyday at work, and yet he felt miles away from him. It was hard to speak to him, about anything. Yet, he knew he had to try.

"So how ya been?" Josh asked him one day, leaning on Simon's desk while he was busy with library records that he needed to get in the system.

"Not, bad. Really." Simon was subdued and didn't smile. Didn't even try.

"You're looking good." Josh nodded. He had to say something sweet. He knew to mention Sid, his baby son. Couldn't let him think he might recent him. It was stupid to keep ignoring him, he knew. But he hadn't any idea what he was suppose to say to his ex, now. After all he had Ste, and things were just dandy for them. Ste had started cooking classes.

"Thanks." Simon was cold though.

"Didn't? Didn't I see you down at the Black Cat with someone, recently?" Josh winced. He'd forgot the bloke's name.

"Just a friend." Simon gave him no more info. He tapped away at his keyboard as if he might be in the middle of a novel.

Josh nodded, thinking in his head, who he might know he could set him up with.

"I'm fine, Josh." Simon finally looked at him. "Really."

"OK." Josh didn't believe it for a second. Couldn't have a good bloke like Simon lonely. Even if he were a single father living with his baby's parents. Just wasn't right. Just wasn't. He was too young for that.

a moment of desperation

2010-03-02T01:09:00.010-06:00

Before Gemma knew it she was downing chicken McNuggets with the new chili sauce at lunch.

"See, nothing to it. I'm famished." Gemma smiled sweetly at Lyle.

"How can you stand that wretched stuff?" Lyle squinted.

"I told you," Gemma stared at him. "I'm famished."

"I still think you should take the test." He looked at her seriously.

"Just to amuse you Is that it?" Gemma slightly fummed. "I'm fine. OK."

"Yeah." He didn't smile though.

"What is it then?" Something was on his mind.

"My mother." He looked back at Gemma then. "She gave me a hard time about this and everything down at the shop." He stole a fry then and bit into it.

Gemma couldn't help but smile then.

"If she only knew." Gemma sighed.

"Knew what." He wasn't taking this as a laugh. He winced hard then. "Bugger! She was after one of those test too. Fuck! Me Mum's pregnant!"

Gemma laughed hard then as she bit into a fry. Thank god, it was his mum and not her.

before you know it

2010-02-28T02:17:00.027-06:00

Gemma was quite a pixie to Lyle. What had she done to him the last two weeks or so? Blown fairy dust in his eyes and woke him up? Really, she was quite beautiful in her own mystifying way. It made him want to live again. She had no idea how she'd melted this ice age away of his. She was making him mellow, and he'd found his smile again. He loved having her around. She was so sweet and delicate. Shy, in fact. Really, he would hate something awful to happen to her.

He quickly went down to the shop. But low and behold in a city with thousands of drug shops, there was his Mum just in time to find him, pick up a pregnancy test kit.

"Oh my lord!" she pinched his cheek before she even let him know she'd sneaked up on him.

"Mum, shut it! Will you!" Lyle gave her wince. He hated her wicked touch. And she was dressed like a teenager, thinking she was one.

"You'll marry her, won't you?" His mum's diamond eye set on him, making him squirm.

"Its just for a mate, Mum." Lyle gave her a soured look.

"Oh, really, who then?" His mum winced.

"Jesus! Mum, you don't even know her." Lyle swelled up. Everything had been so romantic, until his Mum showed up. They rarely saw each other, anymore.

"I'm surprised you don't call me, Neve." She bit back then, crossing her arms.

"Mum." Lyle's face tensed. "You know, I'll always think of you that way, no matter what, even if I know the truth, you took me in and raised me as your own." He knew he'd been bitter about finding the truth that she was not really his mother, but just the same, she'd been there for him. And now, he had to be there for someone else. Gemma and her baby.

such a bitter taste

2010-02-25T11:19:00.001-06:00

Gemma thought she might be lost. Truly, she felt so weak, lately. She hadn't the courage to drink under all this pressure. She was so afraid she'd lose herself more than she always was. And being at the bar was not helping.

"I need you." She called Lyle on her cell.

"Don't shit me like this!" Lyle wasn't much help.

"What?" She was frantic. A panic attack was surrounding her, pulling her down as if she might disappear if he didn't come quick.

"Hang on! Don't go anywhere! I'll be right there. OK!" Lyle told her.

She just nodded.

"Are you nodding, right now?" He wanted to know.

"Yeah." She breathed.

Thankfully, he was coming. Of course, it seemed for ever in the masses. Finally, he showed up about 30 minutes later.

"Are you all right?"

"Dizzy." She nodded.

"Why didn't you say so?" He demanded.

"Sorry." Her lips felt so chapped. Her body saw raw. Really, it was quite disgusting. He helped her back to his place.

Finally, the were in the quiet.

"Honestly, I used to not be like this at all." She promised him while he made her tea. "I used to love a bloody good time. Its like I don't know how, now."

Lyle just nodded as she sat down the tea there in his bit of a kitchen.

As soon as Gemma saw the tea, she hurried to the bathroom to throw up.

"Shit! You're sick. What are you keeping from me?" Lyle yelled from his bedroom.

Gemma's eyes watered as she sat there on the bathroom tiles. She flushed the commode. Really, she didn't think she was keeping anything from him.

revisted

2010-02-19T13:24:00.000-06:00

Scotty was 8 now. Billy had just about forgot that.

They'd stopped at his grandmother's on the way out of his village where his home was. They'd avoided his parents because they'd informed Billy so long ago, they didn't think much of his situation with Newt. It was inevitable to them that it was flat out wrong. But here they were going about the flee market to buy doll clothes for Leia's new baby that had came between Laim being born and a new sibling on the way. She was a very good mum so Newt had promised her if they found anything good on their little trip, he would be sure to bring her back something.

So they'd shopped. Had the famous shepherd's pie at the nearby pub. Finally Billy decided they should at least visit Grandy.

"Well, this is the first I've heard of her." Newt looked at him as he wasn't expecting them to see family on this trip. Just Billy's old haunts. Like the football field by the park that was snow covered and the school he'd gone to as a boy. "How could you? Avoid her so long?"

"Because, Mum would want it that way." Billy winced.

"Nice that you've decided to break some rules." Newt smirked as they waited for someone to answer the door.

"Well, hello!" Her old voice croaked as she gave him a hug. It felt as if she was still right in the head. Then she hugged Newt tightly. "What have done to your hair, Billy?"

Newt almost laughed.

Billy looked at her blankly.

"Grandy? Its me, Billy? That's Newt. We-" He stammered a little. "Live together."

"Boys. Boys. Boys. I used to have lots of boyfriends, you know." She showed them the way into her rock cottage. The floors creaked and it was so dark inside. But a warm fire glowed, and she was dressed in jeans, boots and thick gray wool sweater to keep her warm.

Newt pressed his lips tight about to laugh, but he didn't. Billy gave him back a grin.

Naturally, she poured a little brandy in shot glasses for them.

"Well, well, what have you two been up to?" She wanted to know. Billy looked at Newt as he got out a picture of Leia.

"Here's my daughter." Naturally, Leia was all smiles and angelic.

"My, she's just an angel!" She took the picture. She tucked it away in a picture frame where other photos were. One next to Billy in his adolescent footballer uniform. "Scotty told me all about her."

"He did?"

"That was ages ago." She went to get out any sweets she had.

"Really, Grandy, you mustn' go to so much trouble." Newt told her.

"Now who's boy, are you?" She looked him over.

"No one's in particular." Newt just smiled.

Billy gritted then.

"He's my friend, Grandy." Billy sighed.

"You have any little ones, to call your own?" Grandy wanted to know as she put her arm around Newt as if she could be his substitute grandmother if he wanted.

"Matter of fact, I do." Newt grinned. He got out a picture of Liam who wasn't quite walking yet, but close.

"He's your spitting image." She took it from him and went to tuck it away with the others. Newt smiled all over as if he hadn't thought she'd take the wallet picture. "My, you're so young, and father, already? Does he live with you?"

"Yes, Liam lives with me and his mother."

"Such a young family, indeed." She shook her head.

"And another on the way." Newt added.

Billy shot him a look to shut it now.

"What in the world do you do, so young?" She stared at him, intently.

"Well, I'm working at the hospital, right now. A nurse, some day, I hope. But the rest of the family helps out a great deal." He told her.

"Not many families like that." She crossed her arms. "Wish Billy had a family like that."

Billy sucked in a breath. He knew Grandy didn't think much of his parents.

Newt just smiled and looked at Billy, letting him know, just how well off he was with out his parents, who wanted nothng to do with him.

itching to be good

2010-02-17T14:26:00.000-06:00

Alfie was happy they had the house to themselves for Valentines day.

"Its not that I have anything against my sweet brother, but sometimes, its a bit tight here," he said before he could think what he'd said to Amy.

"Are you saying its all my fault?" She sounded so down now.

"No, no, of course not. Its not your fault." He hugged her and did his best to kiss any inkling of discouragement she might have. "I love you, and I love that we can all be together. One big happy family, you know." And it was growing. Just a bit of a baby bump was showing now. Alfie placed his hand on her tummy in hopes of a kick. "I want to be with you. I want us, all together, I do. It just gets a bit cramped. Sorry."

Amy didn't smile.

"Are you feeling well?" He was concerned. At least Liam was napping and Leia was busy with a coloring book at the coffee table. Amy shrugged. She said she was just fine.

"And hows that figure drawing class, you got in to?" She hadn't said much about it.

"There are loads of things I have to learn. Everyone knows - tons more than I do." She complained what she'd been keeping in all this time.

"But you're wonderful, you are. I love how you sketch." He squeezed her shoulder, to give her reason not to be discourage.

"Evidently, I'm doing it all wrong." She was about to cry.

"What? No. Don't believe any of that shit. You're the best, the best, as far as I'm concerned." He smiled as they sat on the couch watching the Olympics.

"Well, you are biased, you are my husband." She looked at him out of the corner of her eye.

"That I am, but you are truly talented." He smiled back.

"They say I'm far to slow. Out of practice. I suppose." She frowned.

"Well, then, we'll show them." Alfie pulled his T-shirt over his head. "Get out that sketch pad and go to work." He sat in the floor and gave her a poise, yet remaing as natural and comfortable as possible.

She just laughed and did as he said.

mind over matter

2010-02-15T03:50:00.017-06:00

"You're being such a brother now to Gemma," Soren couldn't keep his smile in as he watched Rupert worry about her.

"No. No, I don't feel that way at all." He sounded as if were a promise.

"Aw, come on, you miss her. You're worried. Worried about her with this, this Lyle character." Soren watched Rupert fold clothes with such precision. Soren was sure he must have done it professionally somewhere. He really knew how to keep a house in order even if it were mostly Soren's things mingling with his in the laundry.

"I don't even know him. I've never met him. I dunno." He was in a tizzy as he did things to keep himself occupied.

"You love your sis, you know you do. Its all right for you to feel this way." Soren gave him a pat on the back.

"I just don't know her, you know, I want- I want to know her, but what if she could care less, to even consider who I am." Rupert bit a small frown. He was getting teary eyed.

"Aye," Soren said pulling him back to him by his belt loops. "I don't want to hear talk like that. She adores you."

Rupert shook his head, no. "She wanted- wanted someone straight. I know she did."

"Come on, has she made a scene about you and me, in anyway?" Soren touched Rupert's sad face then. He just looked up at Soren. "I think not."

"I heard what she said, the way she said. ' I think you'd like this Lyle fellow, he's gay'." He sucked in a breath.

"Well, then, its me she doesn't like, now isn't it? Not you. She thinks you can do better, that's all." Soren said so calmly.

"She just doesn't know you." Rupert winced.

"Even then, she probably thinks you could do better. Right?" Soren glared.

"I don't care what she might think. Really." Rupert told him.

"Exactly." Soren smiled. He touched Rupert's nose with his index finger. They kissed then. Soren knew exactly how to side track Rupert. Soon the clothes were on the floor and they were taking refuge in bed as if everything would be all right, soon enough, in each others arms.

Valentines

2010-02-14T03:34:00.027-06:00

It was about time they made time for each other. Newt thought he could be studying. But this was more important.

"I didn't want you to think I'd forgot about you." Newt said brightly to Billy on Valentines day morning. "We're spending the whole day with each other." He woke Billy with a kiss.

"When?" Billy looked at him blankly. "Isn't it a snogfest tonight at the Black Cat? I have to be there?"

"No, you don't." Newt whispered into Billy's ear with a smile.

"I don't?" He looked as if he could use a dozen more 40 winks. As it was, he hadn't gotten home til the wee morning hours. His nights were spent at the Black Cat.

'Um, no. I talked to Col. He's got plenty of help. So it'll be just the two of us." Newt told him.

"Are you completely sure, cause it'll be hopping. A really black hearts, love stinks sensation. Ian and the boys are playing in the underground." Billy looked back at him wincing.

"He assured me." Newt sighed.

Billy turned toward Newt. Finally a proper long snog that ended quite delightful with more kisses as the touching came so a full throttle shag would be in place. How else would they start Valentines day?

"What will we do?" Billy asked afterwards all wrapped up in Newt.

"How about a train ride?" Newt was being mysterious.

"For what? We don't shop." Billy smiled. He got all his clothes from the thrift shops or whatever Colin might decide to give him from his wardrobe that he never wore. Like the black leather jacket Colin wore in his single days.

"We're in a rut," Newt said. "We need a change of scenery."

"I like what I'm seeing right now?" Billy laughed softly.

"I thought we might go back to your village for the day." Newt told him.

"What? No." He shook his head. "I can't. Don't want to see me Mum and Dad."

"We don't have too. I was thinking, food and company. You know, places you liked. That's all." New had his arm around Billy.

"Oh." Billy kissed Newt. "Honestly, I kind of like being right here."

"Well, of course. But lets do something. We must. Besides, its time they let us in that one horse town of yours, don't you think?" Newt said so bravely.

Billy did his best to smile. "I guess so."

"But first. Leia made us treat. Chocolate heart cakes." Newt went to get them on the dresser. They were the size of fat cookies but smothered in chocolate. "Just her way to wish us the best Valentines day."

"Should we take her with us?" Billy looked as if they should.

"She has a Valentines day party to get to. Some other time. This is our Valentines day. Remember?" Newt reminded him as he smashed part of the cake in Billy's mouth.

simple plan

2010-02-13T03:13:00.024-06:00

"Bugger!" Gemma scowled putting her cell away.

"Is something wrong?" Lyle looked at her, who just in his sleep pants, making tea the next morning.

She couldn't help but glare. He was bloody fit. Brilliant in fact. She thought it best not to mention her brother's feelings about what she'd said. Obviously, saying gay was offensive.

"Nothing." She looked at him blankly. "He's just the sensitive sort."

"Must run in the family." He made light of it and went back to making tea and toast.

She made an effort to smile. Really, she didn't want to be a bother.

"Did you sleep well enough?" He then asked, not really noticing if she had or not.

"Well, enough." She'd tossed and turned, trying to figure this Robby out. He hated everyone. How on earth could she do anything to please him?

"It'll get better, I suppose." He shrugged.

"What do you suppose he wants from me?"

"Robby?" He winced. "Let him shrivel up and die. Don't worry about him."

"But." She didn't know what to ask.

"We could straighten your hair. See if that works. There are plenty of Katy Perry's and so on. We'll just have to define you. Let the fans find you." He sounded so certain what to do. "Of course, it would help if you were ready for the clubs."

"You'll take me?"

"No, I'll dress you for the occasion. That's my job." He looked at her as if he had a job to do, and he was damn sure to do it today, or there might not be a tomorrow here as far as Gemma could see.

does it matter

2010-02-12T03:28:00.038-06:00

"How is it?" Rupert wanted to know first hand from his sis about her trip to London. He was sipping tea while Soren was downing juice from the fridge at The Oaks. He hadn't actually got the nerve to go back home, as of yet. He knew he should, but would he want too. It was still a lot to absorb. His father, in a threesome. Three way. Oh, there were three of them. It rolled over and over in his head. How was that possible? He still didn't want to believe it.

"Fine." That was the way Gemma simply put it.

"That's all you can say? Its London for God's sakes!" Had she know idea, how he longed to be in London?

"Well, its busy, you know." She sounded indifferent.

"What's happened?" He sensed she already wanted to come home. "Where did Rob put you up? Is you treating you right?"

"I haven't seen him in what seems ages. I'm staying with this, bloke, who works for him." She finally confessed.

"What? Are you kidding me? Seriously? What the fuck is going on!" Rupert shouted in the phone then. Soren shot him a look as if they'd need to take a trip to save her.

"Its all right. He's fine. He's really not so bad." She told him.

"Who is he?" Questioned Rupert out of concern. Someone had to look out for her, evidently.

"His name is Lyle." She sighed. "You would probably like him."

"What's that suppose to mean?" Rupert winced.

"He's gay, all right." She was in a huff.

"OK. Whatever." Rupert squinted, realising for the first time that Gemma had a problem with his sexual orientation. He soon hung up after that, stung by what she'd said.

"Don't you just love having a sister?" Soren gave him a pat on the back "It'll drive you mad."

"Evidently, she isn't so mad about me, other than being mad, that her dear brother is a puff." He stared into space feeling a tad empty that he'd been so concerned for her, when in fact she could careless what he did because of what he was.

"What did she say?" Soren was concerned.

"It doesn't matter." He scowled then, putting his phone away.

"Now, now, she'll come around, she will. Just don't give up on her, right yet." Soren held his shoulders then, so gently. Before he knew it, Soren was breathing him in with a kiss. Soon, it hadn't mattered what his sis had said at all about this Lyle.

just a glitch

2010-02-11T01:35:00.039-06:00

Lyle was none to pleased when the secretary told him they'd forgotten to find a place to put Gemma up. He figured Robby to be a cheap bastard. But this, how sad.

He looked over to Gemma who hadn't found anything she'd be caught dead in,yet, at the wardrobe attic.

"Looks like, you'll be shacking up with me the next few weeks." He rolled his eyes. He never thought of himself as a bed and breakfast. Honestly, he wasn't much of a morning nor night person. He was emmersed with this shitty job. And now he had to take stragglers home. What more did Robby want from him? For his ex, he certainly did more for him now than he did during their relationship. "Sorry. The bitch is like that, if you haven't noticed."

"Who is the fuck'n bitch?" Gemma looked at him seriously. "Sorry, I dunno."

"Why, Robby, of course." Lyle shrugged. "You'll learn to see him that way. Just give it time."

She got her coat and hat and followed. They'd have to take the train home. He really wished he could be better company. But truth be told, he hadn't really had a normal conversation in so long, it was a bit frightening now. She looked to be a poor wretched of a waif. Seriously, he wished he could say she was on holiday, but she wasn't.

They got to his little box of a flat. Just a curtain to part his bed from the kitchen and livingroom combined. There was a futon. "You can sleep here." The place was modern, but very compact. The loo was just a shower in a stall and a small commode handy, in his bedroom that was covered by yet another curtain. And to think he thought he was moving up in the world.

He saw her pucker a frown.

"Don't cry, please." He begged as he cracked open a bottle of white wine from the small fridge under the counter. "I swear, I thought you were the next Madonna, the way he talked of you, you know. I don't get you." He handed her over a glass of wine.

"I dunno, what I am." She sniffed.

"Have you been to London, before?" He wondered.

"Yeah." She mumbled.

"Sight seeing I take it?" He imagined on her school days, a day trip, winning something precious, naturally.

She shook her head, no. "I ran away once."

"Oh." Maybe she wasn't exactly as simple as he thought. He liked that. He did. A slight smile came to his face. Lyle hadn't smiled in a good long while.

not on this train

2010-02-10T01:11:00.045-06:00

Gemma didn't know if she could face London, alone. At least Fletch had spent the last few nights with her. Perhaps he was worried about her frame of mind after finding out about her brother and sister, Kelsy and Rupert from her mother. She so wished he'd come with her, but he had to get back to Monty.

It was really confusing. All this devastion of reason. Gemma knew she was a part of it, too. When she thought of herself just repeating history. Her mother's history with men. It disgusted her completely. But here she was with Rob off to London. It felt as if they were there in no time. And it was all so business. A busy business, indeed, and she had no idea what way to turn.

"I'll leave you to Lyle." Rob smartly told her. As he looked at the fit blond busy-body on his head set, even a microphone attached to him, as well, Gemma felt a lump rising in her throat.

It was a little over the top, but Gemma stood there like an idiot at Rob's offices, watching people on phones and computers chatting away with business deals. "Lyle, take care of her. Now." He ordered.

Naturally, Lyle was on his headset and barely gave Rob a look, just a mellow sigh. As Rob turned away to ask something of someone else, Gemma saw Lyle look at Rob then giving him a go to hell look.

"Well, come along." He walked down the soft wall of carpet. She tried her best to keep up.

"I'm-I'm Gemma," she put out her hand, but he didn't take it. He was a bit intimadating.

"Yes, I know, " he didn't look back. He kept going. "We've been expecting you. The bitch won't shut up about you."

"What?" She scowled. Who was the bitch?

"Never mind." He sighed looking over his shoulder. He showed her to an office then. Possibly, it was his office. He seemed to be doing three or four things at once at the computer and with two phones at the desk. He showed her a seat. Finally, he looked at her with his chin resting on his hand, just so he wouldn't fall asleep. "Hummmm."

"What?"

"Can you say anything else but that, aye?" He didn't seem to have time for any of this.

"No, I'm sorry. Really, I am." She was about to burst in tears. This was too much to her.

"Nothing's happened yet, babe, why the sad sort now?" He scowled as if she was no help to him what so ever.

"I don't know what they want from me." She sniffed.

"Not this shit, thats for sure." He handed her a crisp handkerchief then as if was going 'green' only no one would ever notice. "Look, chin up, we've all had our bad days. I've certainly had my bad years, but do you see me blubbering like a ninny around, here. Do you?" He was serious.

"No."

"All right then. Show me what you've got." He shrugged.

"What?" She was back to tears, again.

"Chill. Babe. Relax. Its a business," He sighed. "Take off that horrid hat for starters. Robby wants some changes. He didn't say what. So tell me, something about yourself, then. All right?"

Gemma was going to have a melt down. She didn't think she needed changes. Honestly. She liked her black tam. It was great for bad hair days. She was sure of it now. She should have never came to London.

adding it up

2010-02-06T03:37:00.027-06:00

"Shit, we are a litter." Rupert sighed as he stood in the corner of the lovely old room. Soren brought him a lager and nuts.

"Take it easy. You're family's not that bad." Soren grinned. Rupert watched his mother from a distance.

"I wonder how she met my father. She's so, different than I ever imagined." He winced as he sipped his lager.

"Why don't you go ask her," Soren suggested with a nudge. "You deserve to know, now don't you?"

Rupert nodded and decided to find his way to her on the couch who was cuddled by her Demetri.

"I know you don't know me, but could you at least tell me how you came about with my Dad." He tried his best to ask nicely.

"Well, of course, I could at least tell you because I know Gil, won't." She padded a place for him to sit next to her. At least, she let Demetri mingle, finally. "A musical festival." She smiled. "He used to play the base guitar in a band. He was quite a loner. I imagine he still is. Don't know what got into him. All right, we were a little high. He's so different when he's high. He was...a friend of Gemma's father. I don't know if you want to know the rest."

Rupert just winced. "What do you mean?"

"He liked, all right... he was in love with Gemma's father. And I didn't like it. Are you sure you want to hear this?" She squinted.

"Yes." He was certain he did.

"It was a threesome." She sighed.

Rupert's eyes lit. He almost choked on a peanut then.

here it comes

2010-02-04T03:13:00.038-06:00

It was now or never. Kelsey had put the troops together. They'd invited Gemma's mother for tea. She had everyone there that mattered. Gemma and Rupert, and of course, those who mattered to them. Soren and Fletch. And of course, there was Colin who'd made the lovely snacks.

"It'll be fine. It will." She smiled. It wasn't really an intervention. Possibly it was. Hard to say. It wasn't that she saw her Auntie everyday. She was quite mad about her Greek these days and they never saw her, but she'd promised she'd come.

Finally, the moment arrived. Maureen was at the door. Of course, they all stood there as if the queen was arriving. Damn, if she didn't bring the Greek with her.

Kelsey gritted a smile.

"Whats all this about?" She looked around as if she might be in the wrong place. "I thought it was just us, girls."

"Well, mother, I thought you'd like to meet someone." Gemma smiled sweetly and pushed Rupert in front of her. "Does he look familar?"

Kelsey just glared at Gemma, how could she just do such a thing, push the poor boy out front like that.

"Well," She shrugged with a smile and showed off her Demetri then, who flashed a smile as if she owned him, and he did what she commanded.

"Mum, please, think, you know him. He's one of us, isn't it?" Gemma waited for nothing.

"Yes." She simply put it so coldly. Truly, she was the ice queen.

"Mother how could you!" Gemma scowled.

"Three of you is a very hard thing to raise on a budget. Especially, if you're just a barmaid." Her mother informed her.

"The three of you?" Kelsy wondered what that was about. "Where's the third?"

"You are." She winced.

Kelsy chest tightened. Unbelievable.

"What!" Kelsy blurted.

"Actually, you were first," Maureen pointed. "Then came Gemma and you." She pointed to Rupert as if she'd already forgot his name. "Your father would have it no other way, " she went on to tell Rupert. "He said he'd take care of you and then he never let me hear of either of you since. I thought you went to the states."

Rupert just glared at her.

"MY GOD! MY WHOLE LIFE HAS BEEN A LIE!" Kelsy heaved.

"But you're my sister." Gemma was estatic about that. "I knew, I could feel it, you know, something was missing. Missing from my life." Gemma informed her mother.

"What about Cecil?" Gemma wanted to know. She'd forgotten to even ask him to come.

"No, he's your mother's." Maureen shrugged. "His father was a sailor from Arkansas, as I recall."

"But I remember the story very well how she had me. I do." Kelsy was angry.

"That was my story. Not her story. It was your mother's story." Maureen clarified. "God I need a drink." She pointed for Demetri to get her a brandy. He poured a glass full, but she took the bottle for herself. Rupert just hugged himself as they dispersed on the food. Really, everyone was in love with Colin's feast. Or they just needed to stop talking to their mother.

everyone needs someone

2010-02-03T03:15:00.041-06:00

The bottom had fallen out of Simon's world. Benji was off to jail in Barcelona. He didn't even get a chance to say good-bye. Still he was left with lots of questions. Benji didn't fill any of the answers. He wouldn't even see him.

Simon didn't understand it. He didn't want to. It must have been a mistake. He had no idea that Benji was on the run. Evidently. What was he to him now? Just a holiday?

Granted, he didn't know that Benji the the cops were after. It couldn't be sweet Benji. By the looks of him he was so innocent. Or Simon thought. He was always giving and helped out when he could. How would he ever survive in prison? How would Simon ever get by without him?

Naturally, his mates gathered around. For a little while. Newt had no time for him with his studies at the hospital, and Billy was busy holding down the Black Cat, as it was. And it just didn't feel right to lean on Josh who had Ste now.

Honestly, he had never felt so alone. Except he had baby Sid and Kelsey along with Colin who told him he could stay with them as long as he liked even if hated for them to put up with him.

He stayed at work as much as possible when he wasn't with Sid. Honestly, he felt as if he was in a vast of nothingness. And then Ian showed up.

"Who's idea was that?" Simon was on his cell right away with Maxie.

"You know I'm busy with the baby and Katy," Maxie said, but Simon knew the real reason he was avoiding him. Maxie knew how close they could be. How that had been.

"Well, what do you expect me do do with Ian?" Simon felt he'd been put on the spot. Did his mates think they could mend him like that. Just stick him with the mate you haven't been with yet. As if they could all be his lovers. Simon was full of disgust.

But he met Ian down at the Black Cat as if it might be a date. But it wasn't. It would not be a date. And then Ian had the gaul to ditch him for a real blind date, evidently. Quentin. "Do you know him?" Ian asked.

"No, I don't believe I know you." Quentin gave him a big toothy grin. Instantly, Simon was put off by him. Just who did these people think he was. Just a nutter going through a bad time. He was in love. He was still in love with Benji. That was not going away over night. Even if Benji was doing his damnedest to avoid him like a horrid illness, evidently.

"And I grew up in this village." Quentin told him.

"Me too." Simon winced.

"Well, hasn't changed at all, now has it?" Quentin made small talk.

"No, not really." Simon shrugged, hugging himself.

"I take it you'd rather be anywhere but here at the moment." Quentin noticed.

"Yeah."

"Me, too. My ex, might show up any minute. How about we go for a coffee?" It wasn't horrible out, as it had been. But a chill in the air as winter hung on.

"All right." It had been forever since Simon had been outside.

They went for a walk then.

"I hear you've been in a bad way." Quentin mentioned on their stroll through the park.

"How so?" Simon winced. He didn't like folks talking behind his back.

"News gets around when their is an art thief about." Quentin shrugged.

"Yes, that, well, I know nothing of it, really." Simon bit at his upper lip.

"Maybe its best that way. He kept you in the dark, did he?" Quentin's eyes lit as he leaned in slightly, but Simon wouldn't let him close.

"Yes, afraid so. But I-I have a son to worry about, you see."

"A son, how fortunate is that?" Quentin smiled.

"Very." Simon sighed.

"Well, I'm definitely thinking, once you get off this mountain of self-loathing, you'll find yourself the hit of every kiddie group date." Quentin told him.

"Really?" Simon winced.

"There's so many of us, just like you who wish we were a Dad. But it doesn't happen to all of us, obviously, so we just have to watch from a distance." Quentin left it at that. Simon just smiled thinking Quentin had the potential of being a better mate than the ones he did have.

any given day

2010-02-02T03:59:00.013-06:00

Gemma hugged Fletch tightly when she met up with him. She'd missed him terribly.

"What is it? It can't be that bad." He looked down at her with her arms around him.

"Its my mother. I want her to meet Rupert. I think he's my brother." She sighed.

"Oh." He didn't show much emotion.

"Look, I'm still going to London." She told him. "This is important to me."

"I know. I get that, I do." He nodded. "Its just, I thought perhaps, you know."

"What?" She looked up at him with her eyes open wide as if she wanted to remember his face in every-way.

"You know."

Gemma sighed. She didn't know what she felt for Monty. "Please, just be here for me. Please."

"I got your back, OK." He kissed her as if he meant it too. Gemma liked having someone on her side.

its not over yet

2010-01-30T07:31:00.002-06:00

Simon was in limbo at work. He wasn't sure what would happen to Benji now, who was in jail. Possibly, they were sending him back to Spain. It wasn't like they were exactly letting him speak with him. If only he knew the truth. He just wanted the truth. Meanwhile, he was practically pulling his hair out with this new computer system that was suppose to better circulation as well as in tech.

"How about a latte?" Josh came with coffee and scones.

"Can't." Simon shook his head as he stared into his monitor. He was jittery enough, already.

"You're favorite." Josh stared at him patiently.

"No. I don't want it."

"Whens the last time you've eaten?" Josh questioned.

"It doesn't matter." Simon wouldn't look at him. He had work to do. He'd been away enough with the baby as it was. He might be here tonight til the cows came home.

"What can I do?" Josh rolled up a chair next to Simon's and plopped down.

"Nothing." Simon winced.

"But I want to help you." Josh looked at him as if he did care. "I haven't completely stopped loving you, you know. I'm here for you if you need me."

Simon looked at him out the corner of his eye. He wished he could be sure that Benji loved him at all. He didn't know, anymore. Simon sighed, took a sip of the latte and showed Josh a computer he could work at. He knew Josh was familiar with the program. All he needed to do was click into the window and check off the information needed just for this library's data base. Unfortunately, there were hundreds of files to go into.

perhaps

2010-01-28T07:42:00.011-06:00

Fletch had chosen Monty over Gemma. Honestly, the bloke was hurting. Things were getting better. And besides, Monty was a lot of fun. Always full of music. He was more than just a drummer. All sorts of songs were floating around in his head. Some nights they stayed up jamming in his room. It was lovely and so true.

Except, he missed Gemma, a little. Possibly Monty did too, only he wasn't saying.

"You think we're loons?" Fletch had to wonder about their situation with her.

"Is that what we are?" Monty gave him a goofy smile.

"Why am I like this?" Fletch was concerned. "I want to do the right thing, and I think I have, but she's on mind, you know. I hate it."

"Don't try to fight it." Monty told him. "She is good for us, and if she's given the time, maybe she'll come back."

"But she's going to London." Fletch reminded him as he laid in bed strumming his guitar.

"Such the shits, aye." Monty shrugged finding a cool melody on his little keyboard.

"Tell me about it." Just then Fletch's cell vibrated. It was Gemma. "Speak of the devil." He grinned as he took the call. "What is it, luv?" Naturally, that sat her off. He grinned more, listening to her crisis.

"If I do this for you, will you come and hang out with us." He looked at Monty then. Perhaps their troubles were over.

let it be

2010-01-26T02:22:00.012-06:00

"Honestly, I dunno why I bother with this shit, Soren." Rupert looked at Soren who still felt the need to kiss his neck and his chest, even before the sun was up.

"Stop worrying," Soren sighed. "I'll be with you. Promise. We'll find out together about Gemma's Mum being yours. All right."

Rupert felt so sad. What if none of it were true. His Dad might as well have found an orphant on the street. Just as good a story, now wouldn't it be? He was restless. To restless to let Soren take his troubles away. He so wanted to. He did.

"Can you relax." Soren messaged the corner of his temples. "You're too young to have worry lines. You know that."

Rupert bit his bottom lip. He slyly smiled. He loved it here at Soren. He had no intentions of going home. Really, it was quite a lull here. No one moving fast. Just sounds of people in their own little worlds. And they had their own little world too.

He found something rather hard in the covers, nudging him. Rupert couldn't resist to smile. Honestly, he couldn't dwell on this family shit. What happens. Happens.

family matters

2010-01-24T01:56:00.028-06:00

"Babe, do you honest to God know what you're doing?" Colin wasn't sure he liked the idea of all of Kelsy's meddling with Gemma and this Rupert. "It could be a lost cause. He could be no one."

"No, no, that's not true. I can feel it." Kelsy was breathing in incense and doing yoga as if she was coming in contact with the spirit world, or that she might read someone's mind somewhere. She was free of children now and had one more week of rest before she went back to teaching.

"Are you sure you're not just lactating?" Really, she was leaking, he hated to bring it up. But Nancy was crying and she wanted Kelsy.

"It'll be a family reunion. I just know it. It will." She closed her eyes as if it might start to happen right now. He just wasn't so sure he was a total fool for all this new age hype. But this was Kelsy and well, he had to smile and go on with it.

"You know Soren is seeing Rupert, don't you?" Colin brought it up as he went to change Nancy's nappy. Really, she was quite a gem, the way her eyes lit up and her little smile. She seemed quite happy as if she already knew who he was.

"Soren? Soren the cook?" Kelsy asked from the other room.

"Soren the chef." He clarified.

"Really?"

"Yeah, is that bad? Soren's a good kid." Colin cradled Nancy then and came back, hoping Kelsy was done with her therapeutic moves.

"No, its just, well, Rupert really needs someone who'll be there for him. His father sounds like a real arse of some kind. You think Soren can really handle such a situation? I thought he was quite a man-whore?" Kelsy observed.

"What ever gave you that idea?" Colin scowled. "I don't see that in him,at all."

"Very well, but he's a player, through and through." She pursed her lips.

"And you never were?" He smiled so innocently.

"Shut it." She looked at him sternly.

"I'm just saying, things can change when the right person comes along." Colin shrugged.

"Yes, when he wants to do the right thing." Kelsy reminded him. Colin went to get the baby a bottle then.

family business

2010-01-20T01:35:00.038-06:00

Gemma was a bit giddy about going to London with Rob, yet she didn't show it. As it was, this thing with Rupert was still on her mind. She'd felt a connection. Not as in sexual chemistry, but as if he might be the missing link to family.

"You don't feel it?" She asked him point blank down at the Black Cat over a drink. Kelsy was to meet them to have a bit of a family disscussion.

"No, afraid not, you are just a stranger to me." Rupert was down right cold about it as if he really didn't need a sister.

"But suppose I am?" She stared at him hoping for some sort of sincerity about it.

"Dunno." He winced. "Really, its just been me and Dad, forever. I can't think of anyone, but him..and even then, I always felt I was more of a nusience than anything."

"I feel so awful for you." Gemma squinted. "It must have been terrible for you."

"Not really. He's a very quiet man, actually." Rupert told her. "And I had my education. It was all suffient."

"But he didn't love you." Gemma concluded.

"He could have left me in the cold." Rupert glared at her. "He's just formal, that's all."

Gemma bit her tongue, not to make matters work. She really hoped it was true. They were siblings.

Of course, Kelsy came down and discussed the family curse for the next ten minutes. Possibly leaving Rupert with the idea they were either witches or a band of gypsies.

"Its just we have one too many babies at a time." Kelsy shrugged.

"Oh my God, like a litter of pups, is it?" Rupert gave her a disgusting look.

"No, I'm just saying, if your mother...well, I'll let you in on this," Kelsy gritted. "I had two babies and each have different fathers, and they are only a few months a part."

Naturally, Rupert looked as is someone had hit him with something he didn't see coming.

"My mother is dead." Rupert glared at the two of them. "Dad, said so."

"What if she's not?" Gemma stared at him hard.

"Come on, you two," Kelsy jerked her bag over her shoulder. "Lets get this cleared up with Rupert's dad."

"No." Rupert winced. "Its not that I don't want to know." He hesitated then. "Its that he won't say. He won't. He never has. He's a stubborn old fool. I say we find your mother, Gemma. Would she know me?"

"Dunno." Now Gemma felt the ball was in her court. Could they possibly squeeze in a moment with her mother. She'd been practically on holiday for the past two years with the young Greek she'd met on a cruise. He was the only person she thought of these days. To hell with the rest of them.

at the crack of dawn

2010-01-16T10:34:00.000-06:00

It was the last thing to expect. Especially, when its barely morning and the cops come to take someone away. Simon was still in the state of shock. Benji wasn't even dressed.

"Unbelievable!" That's all Simon could say as they shackled Benji, read him his rights and carted him away for the murder of Warren.

"Isn't he already dead?" He asked to evidently no one. This wasn't right. He's declared dead in the village and pops up in Spain..just to be dead again. Simon was frantic, but Benji said nothing.

Not that Simon liked to speak ill of the dead. But Warren, well, he was complicated, to say the least and had evidently left Benji complicated as well. After all, Benji was his cousin which just didn't seem possible to him.

"He couldn't have done it, he just couldn't have!" He told Colin, as the whole house had awoke to the problem at hand at the Black Cat.

"We'll find him a good lawyer." Colin was all matter of fact as he got coffee started as well as egg sandwiches.

"There are no good lawyers in the village." Simon winced.

"You're right about that," Kelsey agreed who went into long detail have the ones who committed murder always got off around here and those who didn't were sent up the river. That left Simon a bit unsettling. As it was, baby Sid was crying and he had to go to him. He had to be here for Sid, but what was he to do for his lover?

professionally, speaking

2010-01-14T14:02:00.000-06:00

Well, what was it that Rob wanted to know? Ian felt a little lost trying to communicate with him. At least Cecil was there to sort it out and hopefully, Rob respected him enough. Cecil had enough info on Ian and the group for him. Still Ian felt a little out of place and not so sure the timing was right. Shou wasn't here, and Ian missed him more than he ever did. Shou was good at this sort of thing. Shou always got his way when it came to music deals. What if they got a raw deal and it was shit? Pure shit. All this hard work for nothing. No real record deal. And even if they did get one, would anyone really buy it? Were they the total package?

"I like the girl." Rob looked at them both and Ian was puzzled. Was he talking about Lauren or Gemma?

"I saw a video of your New Year's eve show." Rob shrugged.

"Oh, Oh, Gemma, yeah, that's, that's Cecil's cousin." Ian sighed.

Cecil just smiled as if the talent ran in the family.

"If we wanted punk, she'd be glorious. Can you tone her down?" Rob glared at Ian then.

"Of course." Ian winced.

"She is a raw talent." Rob agreed. "We just have to hone in on it."

"Absolutely," Ian agreed.

"So who's fuck'n her?" Rob wanted to know.

Ian looked at Cecil who looked at him.

"No one." Ian shook his head.

"Good." He smiled. "Maybe I can have my way with her back in London, purely professional, of course."

"Of course." It seemed decided to Ian who wasn't quite sure why in the hell he was here for this meeting. After all, he was just the bass player, wasn't he?

How's it gonna be

2010-01-12T22:28:00.001-06:00

Gemma could hardly wait to get back to Fletch, but there was Monty waiting too.

"We could work this out, right?" Fletch looked to Monty.

"I could go." Monty had his hands in his back pockets. Gemma didn't say a word but kept her arms crossed.

Fletch looked at Monty a little worried. Gemma turned away just then as they kissed good-bye and Monty left.

"Its just not natural." Gemma winced.

"You weren't saying that other night when we were all in the sack together." Fletch looked at her then.

"I had been drinking, as I recall. You two were high. It was just-"

"What? A mistake? Is that what you're telling me now." Fletch winced.

"Yeah." She wanted to believe that even if she had liked watching them kiss. How unnatural was that, she thought.

"Now you're uncomfortable, is that it?" Fletch wanted to know.

Gemma just nodded.

"OK," Fletch sighed. "I see you've made your choice." He hugged himself then as he watched her in his room.

"What are you talking about?" She winced then.

"You." Fletch smiled. "I'm not giving up on Monty. He needs me."

Gemma gritted. She didn't know what to think. This was not a one off, after all.

Just then Ian tapped on the door and asked if they were descent.

"Yeah, what's up?" Fletch let him in.

"Rob Mackie's in town," Ian said. "He wants to see us?"

"Us? But what about Shou?" Fletch looked at him.

Gemma just sighed. Who cared about Shou. The music promoter was back.

so vulnerable

2010-01-10T10:30:00.000-06:00

Simon wasn't sure if he really liked all this responsibility with baby Sid. Yes, he was Sid's father, and yes, he was splendid with him, but to have nappy duty along with more to do at work, it was stressful.

"Well, it isn't that you're totally alone, now is it?" Benji smiled about the situation. "I'm here to help, aren't I?" They were in their room, and it was in the middle of the night.

"Of course, its just-" Simon couldn't explain it. Really, he felt as if he was Kelsy's servant at the moment. They did live in the flat with her and her husband. And now she'd had her husband's child. "I guess I'm overwhelmed." He felt as if he had no time to himself. Even if he did, he wasn't sure what he'd do with it, anyway. There was a new computer program to learn at work. Still shelving to do, as well at the library, due to some sort of circumstance. Sickness and what-not.

"As soon as you get Sid down for a nap, we need some downtime, that's what you really need." Benji smirked as she rubbed Simon's sore shoulders.

"Possibly, I just dunno what Sid will think when they bring the other baby home." Simon said so sadly as if he wouldn't get enough attention then.

"What are you talking about? He'll be happy to see his sister, don't you think he's missed her as it is, being so long in the womb with her." Benji grinned.

Simon hadn't thought it that way. Soon, Sid was slumbering in his crib and Benji took Simon's hand.

"Now, let him alone." He kissed Simon on the cheek and pulled him back to bed. Naturally, Benji had his ways as he touched Simon to almost put him in a dreamy state. But Simon caught his breath.

""I dunno." He shook his head.

"Come on, he's not going to judge you." Benji whispered.

"He's in the same room." Simon winced.

"Simon, please, try to relax. Will you?" Benji kissed him more, trying to make him forget the stress of the day. He pulled Simon's T-shirt over his head and touched his chest as he kissed his neck while pushing his fingers inside his sleep pants to find his hard on.

Simon slightly let go, breath by breath as Benji went down on him. Slowly, Simon let himself enjoy the moment as he pulsed to Benji's tongue. He felt so weak now, letting Benji have his way with him.

Soren & Rupert

2010-01-03T16:14:00.002-06:00

its coming up

are you experienced

ever so slightly

Rupert was so sure what Ste wanted to hear from him.

"I just wanted to know how it went with, you know, that bloke," Ste said so curiously as he bought him a drink at the Black Cat.

"Why do you want to know?" Rupert looked up at him a tad bitterly.

"Well, I just hope it was good New Year's for you, that's all." Ste shrugged.

"It was fine, and you?" Rupert just glared as he looked at the lager. He would have preferred a white wine, but they had to be men here, now didn't they.

"Couldn't be better," Ste gave him an impish grin. "You know, how it is with me and Josh."

"No, I don't." Rupert wanted to remain innocent.

"Right, of course not." Ste drank at his glass then. "I'm just surprised, that all, you know, you and this-"

"He has a name, its Soren." Rupert said matter of fact.

"Well, Soren, I just thought you would have found you a bird, since, you know." Ste shrugged.

"I know." Rupert didn't know why he hadn't thought of that before. "Look, it was really nothing." He shook his head.

"I don't believe you?" Ste chuckled. "He's haute."

"Tell me about it." Rupert smiled all over then. "I didn't know. Honest to god, I didn't know I had it in me, until I saw him, you know."

"And now you do." Ste gave him a long look. "Did he treat you right?"

"I guess." Rupert winced. "Look, not like it actually happened. We kissed." He sighed then. "A lot."

"Sweet." Ste smiled. "Just as it should be. Get to know each other first."

"Is that the way it was with you and..and Josh?" Rupert asked so innocently.

"Fuck no." Ste laughed then. "I wanted him. I did. And well, he'd broken it off with this long-time lover of his. It was just nothing new. I guess. I wish I could have taken it slow. But I'm just not made that way." Ste confessed.

Rupert thought of Soren then. He wondered how much he was like Ste. Maybe Soren was just wasting time with him. Was that what this was? Were they taking it too slow?

on a roll

2010-01-01T15:26:00.000-06:00

It was definitely Gemma's night to rock new year's eve. She'd really rocked in the 2010 down at the basement in the Black Cat. It was packed. The strobe lights making circles to the beat in the dark. It was all so brilliant. She did her damnedest not to smile. But it was happening. Truly happening.

They'd busted their butts to get ready on such short notice for the show, and it was all so new and fascinating to her. Why hadn't this happened, already?

Then there was Fletch and Monty, along with their little secret. Were they ever to speak of it? Their night of passion.

Now, she could hardly get it around her head how it actually came about, but it had. The three of them. Together. She wasn't sure if she could handle it. A lot like this, but she'd somehow got through the show. And it was amazing.

Now as she choked down a vodka drink that burned her throat, she just noticed who Cecil was with. Someone new. Not that nurse he'd shacked up with and married, hadn't he? No, this was someone knew. French though. Younger, perhaps. Hard to say, but she was definitely into Gemma's dear sweet tattooed cousin. They might as well be attached at the hip, she thought. Thank God, Fletch and Monty were keeping their distance.

"We should party sometime," Ingrid said as she toasted her drink to her.

Gemma only nodded with a smile as it was she had to edge toward Kelsy who had no business being here in all the noise and crowd.

"What are you, mad?" Gemma said once she pushed herself toward her cousin.

"No, I came for the show." Kelsy gave her a kiss on the cheek as if she was pleased. "I knew you had in you, all along."

"Really?"

"You're a natural. You're a rock'n roller." She grinned.

"Ha." Gemma knew a little about how legendary her cousin was when it came to be rock'n. She knew she couldn't quite live up to that.

"I just want you to be happy," Kelsy smiled so genuine then, but it was lost suddenly. Something was happening. The baby was on the way.

"Kel! Are you all right?" Gemma winced as she grabbed Kelsey before she wavered in the crowd.

"Yes, you know what it is! The baby!" She gasped. "Its coming!"

"Jesus, Kel!" Gemma had to find a way to get her out of here. She reached for her cell to call the medics then.

side tracked

2009-12-28T15:44:00.000-06:00

"Don't tell me you're worried about Rupert?" Josh looked at Ste thinking he never knew Ste could be quite that caring. Well, he'd been taking care of Josh, lately which shocked him some too. It was nice that he wanted to make sure they had dinner together, every night.

"No, no, I'm sure he can take care of himself." Ste nodded. He'd mentioned how Rupert had been seen leaving the Black Cat with someone. "Its just the other bloke I don't trust so much."

"Really? Why is that?" Josh winced as he went to make them an early morning brew of tea.

"I saw him with some bloke a few weeks ago. He's a bit impulse in the loo." Ste sighed.

"You saw, something?"

"Not really. Its you know, he looks to be the persuasive sort when he wants to be." Ste explained.

"So you think he might put our Rupert in a compromising position, aye?" Josh looked at him as if perhaps they should step in a do something.

"I dunno. If Rupert says he's not gay, what problem could there be?" Ste went to heat some toast for them.

"Right." Josh nodded. "I just wouldn't want him, you know, hurt."

"I know. I feel the same way. But then again, that's a discovery he has to make on his own." Ste told him.

"So what are you thinking..maybe, he's not being on the up and up with us?" Josh got their brew ready.

"I don't think it has a thing to do with us, he might be the one who hasn't a clue....what he really wants."

They sat down then and began breakfast.

"Maybe I can relate," Josh smiled. "Yeah, I guess we all want that certain something everyone tells you that you want, and then you wake up and figure out, its not there." Josh bit his bottom lip, suddenly he thought of Simon and instantly he was overcome with sadness.

about last night

2009-12-25T11:05:00.024-06:00

Fletch looked at Gemma as he went to pull on his track pants. He saw her look away to who was behind the bed next to the night stand on her side of the bed. Monty.

He wasn't exactly sure how Monty felt about this. It was gig. Just that things were different now. Really different.

"Should we let Ian know about everything?" Fletch winced.

"No, no its none of his business." Monty shrugged with a smile. After all, who knew if something like this might ever happen again, between the three of them. Of course, they'd gotten high and one thing lead to another. It was quite an adventure, indeed. Fletch wasn't sure he could say much more about it. He just nodded.

"Now, don't be in a pisser, will ya, Gem?" Fletch looked to Gemma. "Here's your chance to show Ian what you're made of. You will do it, won't you?"

"Yeah, sure." But still she wasn't quite excited as she bit her bottom lip.

"We can be purely professional." Monty smiled with a nod.

"Purely." Fletch squinted.

"Most definitely." She looked at them both.

Fletch slyly smiled. He hoped she didn't forget about this. Right now. Before Ian came to their room. He knew he certainly wouldn't.

like its suppose to be

2009-12-24T14:52:00.000-06:00

"Cecil! What the fuck!" Ian was furious. Cecil had him lined up to headline the New Year's eve bash at the underground in the Black Cat. "Have you lost it, mate! You know, we have no lead singer. Lauren left us weeks ago."

Now he was in a scrambled, he hung up on Cecil. Who in the hell could he get on such short notice? He banged on Fletch's door for quite a bit before anyone answered.

"We need a singer." He looked at Fletch but noticed Gemma was in his bed.

"What about Gemma?" Fletch looked over his shoulder. She looked at the both of them as if she really wasn't into threesomes.

"Gemma?" Ian looked at her and then Fletch as if he'd lost it.

"She's got the sound. She does." Fletch nodded.

Ian just sighed.

"Well, get dressed. Come on down to the basement and lets get started. Get Monty, too. We can use all the help we can get." Ian hadn't been this annoyed in a long while. Here it was Christmas. This was not what he was wanting to do. No party tonight, he thought. They'd be jamming into the wee hours of the morning.

back home

2009-12-22T21:53:00.000-06:00

Amy was happy to get home and have Liam in her arms, once again. She'd did her best not to miss him, but he'd grown so much in her few days she was gone to the beach on her little honeymoon with Alfie.

"Surprise!" Newt and Billy showed them the Christmas tree, all lit up with little white lights and red hearts and apples.

Amy looked wide eyed at Alfie. She hadn't even thought of Christmas shopping.

"Its all taken care of." Newt assured her. "We've been wrapping packages for days now." He grinned.

"How could you possibly hide that from Leia?" She looked around to find her daughter stepping on her shoes and hugging her hips. Leia was grinning from ear to ear.

"I saw Santa." She laughed.

"Did you really?" Amy wasn't sure she wanted to know anymore. She looked up and saw Leia's picture with Billy and Newt, Liam too, all with Santa. "How nice. Love your photo."

"I was good." Leia informed her.

"Aren't you always." Amy smiled.

"We've got the goose, and all the trimmings." Billy grinned.

"Thanks to Colin, he gave us Christmas dinner." Newt shrugged.

"That was sweet," Amy said, looking at Alfie then.

"Yeah, probably just a bribe for me to work Christmas eve and New Year's at the club, aye?" Alfie plopped himself on the couch then as if he was already tired just thinking about it.

"Yeah," Billy nodded. He put his arm around Newt, and Amy finally got situated with Liam and Leia on the couch.

Amy looked around. This was her happy family.

"Good, news, your sister is in the clear. Looks like she'll be home from the hospital tomorrow." Newt remembered.

"Oh," Amy sighed. She wasn't so sure she was ready to see Sarah, yet.

seriously, though

2009-12-20T12:59:00.000-06:00

Rupert wasn't so sure he wanted any new found family. Actually. It worried him now. He knew his Dad wouldn't want to hear of it. He would after all be doing his quiet little thing for Christmas - to eat a bit of fruit cake from his sister and sip tea while doing sudoku.

"I just don't know what to think," he said to Ste who seemed to be his new best friend these days along with Josh. They'd came out to party at the place where he worked. It was in the Christmas mood about. Music and dance. Everyone had someone except him.

He felt like a third wheel.

"Well, Kel, has changed loads." Josh told him. "She was such a hell raiser. Col wasn't much better, either, but since they've been hitched and the kiddies and all. They are quite nice."

"You don't think she'd be my sister, now do you?" Rupert glared at them both hoping for the truth.

"Cousins, at best. Just a cousin, you know." Ste winced as if he didn't want Rupert to come completely unglued over the prospects.

"Seriously?" Rupert couldn't see that either. He didn't want to bring it up with Dad, but in fact, it would be a lonely Christmas, as always. Dad with his silence. They'd wish each a Merry Christmas and get back to each others little private space.

He really would like a change this Christmas.

that old feeling

2009-12-19T02:53:00.010-06:00

Fletch found Monty more down than ever before. He was sure it had been days since Monty had eaten.

Naturally, Fletch felt more terrible than before. Perhaps it was because he hadn't felt this sort of depression when Lauren left. Or the fact he was with Gemma now. It made him so sad, he didn't know what to say or do, but just to look at him half asleep.

"Are you sick?" Fletch asked first thing. He barely got a shake from Monty.

"Christmas is coming, you know." Fletch told him. "You done any shopping?"

"Whats the point?" Monty barely said under the covers.

"Mate, you got to snap out of it." Fletch sighed.

But Monty was shivering like he might be sick. Fletch took off his sneakers and crawled under the covers to keep him warm. It wasn't long til they started kissing. Like old times. Monty made it so easy to want to take care of him. It felt like the right thing to do. He couldn't just leave Monty all alone. He needed someone. And there was no one, but Fletch.

a splendid afterwards

2009-12-18T02:22:00.034-06:00

"Was that the the best wedding party ever, or what?" Billy laid in bed with Newt the next morning.

"You certainly are taking advantage of this time." Newt mentioned. They were alone. Kelsy had take the kids for them. She had Fletch and Gemma helping her.

"Well, Kel, might be holding Fletch and Gemma against their will, but its nice to have some US time." Billy grinned than as he French Newt as if it might be the start of something.

"I can't remember the last time, honestly." Newt winced. Even on their civil union day they'd came home to a crowded house. "We should think about a honeymoon too."

"Oh really?" Billy smiled. "Where then? Aye? Don't want you getting kidnapped in Spain or anything like Katy did, you know." Bill propped his head up with his hand as he turned to give Newt a serious look as his index finger drew a heart on his bare chest.

"Maybe Ireland would be the place to go." Newt shrugged.

"And all the footballers might hit on us, too. Scratch that. How about London?" Billy pursed his lips.

"Possibly. But I'm thinking foreign. At least, Paris." Newt shrugged.

"The two of us? Paris?" Billy winced.

"Why not."

"I just never guessed you the Paris type, I guess." Billy remained even lipped as they intertwined and kissed. Their skin touching and loving, perhaps silliness prevailed. Maybe not, as they closed in on each other. Sex was inevitable, especially with morning hard ons and the like.

"I always wanted to travel, you know." Newt kissed Billy's neck then and his shoulder too.

"You want to travel?" Billy looked at him as if it were a surprise.

Newt only smiled. He kissed him more. It was time to shut up talking.

would it be so terrible

2009-12-16T14:22:00.000-06:00

Josh noticed Simon who hadn't came down for the festives of the wedding when it was going on. He'd stayed back at the flat with baby Sid. Kelsy had finally gone up to relieve him.

"So when are you gonna start showing off this kiddie yours, dear Simon?" Josh was all smiles and greeted him with a hot spiked punch.

"Its not like I don't go out with him, you know." Simon looked at him as if Josh had had all the time in the world to come up and see the baby. After all, he was only a flight up from him. They worked in the same place. Although, Josh knew Simon was doing his best to avoid him.

"You'll be taking him this Christmas, to your relatives?" Josh questioned.

"No, they can come as see him, anytime." Simon shrugged.

"Does that mean, his uncles here can bring him a Christmas present?" Josh nudged Ste then who had his back to them all this time, mellowing out on a punch, of course.

"Uncles?" Simon winced. "My one great uncle is in a retirement home."

"He meant us." Ste glared at him then. Resting his arm on Josh's shoulder.

"Really, that's highly unnecessary." Simon sucked in a breath.

"Come on, Simon, can't reject our presents, now can you?" Josh smiled.

"I hadn't planned on you two-"

"As uncles?" Ste smiled.

"Yeah." Simon looked at Ste then Josh.

"Well, I say the more the merrier." Benji chimed in then, putting his arm around Simon.

"I guess its settled then. You two come down on Christmas eve and Ste here will cook you something up." Josh almost laughed.

Simon cleared his throat.

"What would you possibly be having?" He winced.

"Pizza," Ste said. "I make my own dough."

"Good stuff, honestly." Josh added.

"Here that," Benji smiled. "Can't hardly wait."

All Josh got out of Simon was a sigh.

a little mission

2009-12-14T08:20:00.022-06:00

"That's the one." Gemma pointed out Rupert to Kelsy at the wedding. "Do you know him?"

"Well, he was upstairs with Amy, earlier, I believe he claims to be a stylist." Kelsy looked at her. What on earth was her cousin going on about now, thought Kelsy. They should be in the middle of the jovial merriment that her dear sweet husband had catered.

"He has our same last name." Gemma was concerned. "Is he a cousin I haven't heard about?"

"Not one I'm aware of. Could be not related to us at all. You know, the blokes are quite ugly in our family. And Rupert is pretty. Pretty as an angel. No, he couldn't be related to us." Kelsy shrugged. "Get me, some sweets, will you?" She looked at her cousin. "Do you know how long its been since I've had a good drink?"

"Fine." Gemma fretted. Just then Kelsy picked up on the fact that she was with Fletch. Kelsy gave Fletch an impish smile as she edged through the crowd to find Rupert. Finally, she grabbed his arm.

"My cousin tells me we might be related." Kelsy beamed.

"What?" Rupert looked at her puzzled.

"You know, cousins, perhaps. Tell me about your family." She wanted to know.

"I'm an only child." He informed her. "My father doesn't talk about anyone in the family. Its just the two of us." He talked on a bit about his father being a professor of music at the nearby college.

"Two of you?" She wanted more information. "You still live at home?"

"Yes, I do." He nodded.

"Funny, but your father's name is the same as Gemma's?" She looked him in the eye. "It might be a far smaller world than you think." Kelsy smiled then. Really, she might have more family over than she knew this Christmas.

soon enough

2009-12-12T02:55:00.027-06:00

"By George! I think she's got it!" Rupert put the last of the eye-liner on Amy. He smiled at her. "Lovely, if I do say so, myself."

He turned around and let her see her self in the mirror. She was in a strapless white gown. It was amazing he'd found something so sweet on such short notice. Perhaps it was a bit short, but that exposed the sexiness of the white rose print stockings along with the white buttoned up ankle boots.

It shocked Amy. Her eyes widen. Was it possible? This was her wedding day.

"Nothing can go wrong now," He said and he looped his arm around hers. She wore long white gloves. He had taken care of all the details They were upstairs at Kelsey's getting ready even Kelsey had to take a look at the winter bride

"Oh, if your sis could see you now." Kelsy responded. "Sorry. But she is on the mend, now isn't she?"

"Yeah," Amy nodded a bit sad. Really, she wasn't expecting much with this last minute wedding. But the wedding march began to play, and she thought she might lose it.

"Come on." Rupert opened the door and there was Newt to walk her down the isle with Leia.

Amy smiled all over. She took her time as she looked at all the waiting faces. There were all the McQueens. Michaela, too. She hadn't seen her in ages. Naturally, there were so many at the bar she didn't know either, but there was Sasha and her family. Not even Josh nor Simon had let her down.

Billy took Leia and there he was, fit as ever in his tux. Alfie.

It wasn't a dream. It was coming true. She would be Mrs. Amy Newton soon enough.

one last thing

2009-12-11T03:31:00.011-06:00

"Do you think I asked for too much from Amy?" Alfie looked at Newt who was helping with his tie and tux.

"I told you, we paid Rupert. He knows what to do." Newt smiled.

"But they never met." He shrugged.

"He'll make sure to get her to the pub on time. All right." Newt nodded.

"Do you think its all a little too fast?" Alfie winced.

"Not in the least, you two need to do this thing. Get on with your adventure in life." Newt informed him.

"I know, but I can't give her everything I wish that I could." Alfie looked a tad worried.

"Even if you could, can you bank on that making you happy for good? You have to make it everyday with each other, somehow." Newt suggested.

"All right, you guru, lets just get this show on the road. I want to be a husband. Amy's husband." Alfie glared at him.

"Then lets do it." Newt laughed. Leia was already in her daisy headband. She wore a beautiful bright yellow dress. One last moment of spring before winter set in.

a bit of an issue

2009-12-10T03:23:00.013-06:00

Simon had his hands full with Sid. He felt so clumsy.

"You know, you might get used to it, if you wouldn't tense so." Kelsy informed him. "You and Benji will have to look after him once Nancy gets here, you know."

"Yes, I'm aware of that, Kel." Simon rolled his eyes. "If only, you didn't watch me like a hawk, it might help."

"Sorry." Kelsey went to sit down easy for a rest. "You really are doing a fine job, both of you. Seriously."

"Yes, its great you're serious about us being serious." He gave her a slight scowl.

"What? You two not getting enough alone time?" She winced.

"Possibly, I've been informed at work they want me to work extra hours to get this new program going." He finally admitted.

"What a shame, indeed. Just in time for the holidays. No doubt." She smirked.

"Yes, no doubt." He sighed as he watched Sid sleep. He just wanted to watch, yet he could hardly wait to see the changes in Sid as he grew. He was a big onion head with pale eyes.

"Seriously, they were afraid there was water on the brain, at first. His big head and all." Kelsy laughed.

"Yes, well, I told you it runs in my family."

"All full of knowledge, no doubt." She hugged herself.

"You got what you wanted, now didn't you?" He looked up at her. That shut her up. Really, it would be nice to have Sid all to himself. He definitely didn't need her remarks, constantly.

it could be Christmas

2009-12-09T03:35:00.026-06:00

Fletch wanted to go Christmas shopping.

"We can't spend all our time in bed." He informed her. "We should go out. I don't think there is anything wrong with that."

"You were the one worked up over Monty, now weren't you?" She had no qualms about it. They were already on the street. As it was Monty was hiding out in his room.

"I feel badly about this." Fletch looked at her. "Us. He's my friend."

"You don't feel that badly." She looked away and saw Amy across the street going into a thrift store with a blond who wasn't Billy. "Who's that with Amy?" She pointed even if she knew it weren't polite.

"How should I know?" Fletch winced.

"Lets find out." She left him on the corner and crossed the street.

"Some holiday shopper, you are." He followed behind her. Finally, they both caught up with them looking at dresses. It was there they learned Amy was getting married in just a couple of hours.

"Seriously?" Gemma asked.

"Afraid so." Amy pushed through hangers of white dresses.

"Oh, don't look so glum. You've found yourself quite a catch in that Alfie." Gemma had to admit. "Quite a looker. What ever you doing seems to be working."

"Perhaps, it has something to do with a little one on the way." Amy would hardly look at either of them.

"Again?" Gemma said so loudly that Fletch tugged her to stop.

"Again?" The blond winced. "What does that mean?"

"She has two already. Some friend you are." Gemma looked him over. "You look awfully familar, who are you?"

When he told her, she looked at him so peculiar, but Gemma didn't say another word.

"I guess we best leave you at your scavenger hunt." She backed away then and they left the shop.

"What's going on with you?" Fletch asked.

"I dunno, its strange, that's all." She hugged herself.

"What's so strange?" Fletch winced.

"He has the same last as me." She shrugged.

off we go

2009-12-08T03:09:00.018-06:00

"I want you to find something absolutely, amazing!" Alfie scooted Amy out the door.

"But." It was just so soon.

"You get the dress. I'll take care of the rest. Just meet me at noon at the Black Cat." He put her coat on her.

"The Black Cat!" She scowled. He was talking about the wedding. "Today?"

"Please! Just be there." He shut the door behind her, and she was out in the cold on her own to find the fabulous dress to be married in. What was he expecting? Of course, she felt even more naked, not to have some sort of child attached to her. Well, there was one, but it hadn't caused her to vomit yet. Was that a good or bad sign, she wondered as she made her way to the bus stop.

Maybe she really needed a good throw up to get a balance of all this. It was as if her life was going in circles. But it would be different, especially, if she found the right dress. Naturally, she kept to her sullen self. No need to be happy about the occasion quite yet.

At the next bus stop she noticed some blond bloke quite striking. Of course, it might have been a girl. Possibly. As luck would have it, more filled the empty spaces, and he jumped right in next to her.

"Sorry." He was quite thoughtful.

"Its all right. Not even quite sure where I'm going. I was informed I needed a dress. A special occasion." She shrugged wondering if she'd said too much.

"What kind of an occasion?" He asked.

"Wedding."

"Anyone you know?" The bus bumped his shoulder next to hers.

"Yes, my own."

"You certainly, don't look happy about it." He smiled.

"Suppose, not, sort of a shock, but its all good. Its just I'm not prepared." She looked him in the eye then.

"Well, you have the cash for something new?" He questioned.

"Not really." She frowned.

"That's quite all right, vintage perhaps."

"Just cheap would do." She hugged herself.

"Well, I'm Rupert, at your service." He smiled brightly as he wanted to shake her hand. She slightly let him. "I'd be happy to help you."

"Really?" She looked at him.

"Not often I see a bride to be on her wedding day." He joked. "Honestly, I've never been to one."

"Well, its at the Black Cat. At noon." She told him.

"Then lets have some fun."

She thought that was wink she saw in his eye. Amy couldn't help but smile.